How to Cultivate Gratitude for a Better Life

Speaker 1: Thank you, I'm here. Are you here, hi? I'm, I'm here. Speaker 2: I'm here. Yeah, I'm here and accountable. Speaker 1: I am here and accounted for. I'm not necessarily accountable . Speaker 2: Oh, my Sounds like you've got some work to do. Speaker 1: I do, I do. I always have work to do. That's okay, though. That's why we are humans. But hey, what a cool reality we've created lately. Speaker 2: Good morning. Speaker 1: Good morning, dr Jenny. Dr Jenny's in the house. She's a little behind my cues today, I see. So what a cool reality we've created though. Huh, you know I was thinking about that in the shower. You know we recently bought a motor home motor coach I'm sorry , motor coach. We have recently got to specifically name it properly. I'm not going to specifically name it properly. You know, we have created an opportunity in employment that could be lucrative in our employment. I think it will be lucrative if they allow us to get more involved. Okay, what are you okaying me for? You don't agree with that? Okay, I'm not going to talk about it. Speaker 2: Nope. Speaker 1: Okay, and what a reality that you know. I was thinking about this. We're kind of in a cool place in our life to where we have open doors for ourselves. You know, we have a motor coach . We can literally get in the motor coach and go anywhere we want to. We can choose it, the motor coach, and go anywhere we want to. We can choose. It's that balance thing for me. We can choose to stay, we can choose to go. It opens and makes things feel a little better for me. Speaker 2: I see. Speaker 1: And it's kind of a cool reality that we have created. Why are you just staring at me? Weird. Speaker 2: I'm listening to you talk. Why do you have such a? Speaker 1: uh, I don't know, you're giving me a complex complex I'm like, I'm sitting here listening to you conversate you know we, we have a, we have , we have an awesome life really , you know, and that's where, kind of where I was in the showers, we're very grateful today. I think, more than kind of where I was at in the showers, we've been very grateful today, I think, more than anything, of how we're moving in the right direction and what I feel our future endeavors are. You know, our businesses having more appointments. You know there's things going on that I really enjoy. The podcast is doing good. You know, everything that I like in the in life is getting better, including my wife. Speaker 2: What was wrong with me to begin with? Speaker 1: Well, you, you know, you did have. I mean, they've never seen you before out there. You know, they don't know that you, you know you kind of look like that guy on that movie back in the 70s. I'm kidding, nobody knows what you're talking about. What was it called? Elephant man? Wow, I'm just playing. I'm just playing. No, I have a beautiful wife and you're currently kicking the crap out of that stuff on your face and I enjoy it that you're doing it. Speaker 2: Oh, you mean the ugly that I was born with? Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're wiping it. Oh, you mean the ugly that I was born with? Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're wiping it off better every day. Speaker 2: You are not ugly by any means Learning how to contour it Is that what it is. Speaker 1: Your makeup's gotten better, your makeup talents. But you know, I'm in this great , I'm just in a grateful place and I was very, very thankful for what I have and who I am and what I've become over the years . And you have a lot to, I have a lot to thank you for and I'm just being grateful. I see I'm being grateful today. Speaker 2: Nice place to be it is. Gratitude will take you in profound places. Speaker 1: I agree, I agree you in profound places I agree, I agree, and my gratitude I express. You know just, I think I kind of internally express my gratitude and I wonder how other people do and what's the benefits of doing it openly or doing it internally. Speaker 2: What does internally mean? Speaker 1: Internally. Speaker 2: Oh, internally. Speaker 1: Are you being judgmental again? Here we are, every podcast now you're judging my herbology now I'm playing, would you? All, please tell her to go pick it on me. Put a comment something. Speaker 2: I was just making sure I understood what you said. Speaker 1: I'm just playing. Well, you know, because I'm not the guy that walks up and says thank you all the time or tells my higher self thank you all the time. I kind of do it internally, with that inner voice, and I want to express my gratitude and make sure that my higher self and you and me, and I'm very pleased with where we are right now. Speaker 2: Do you thank your body. Speaker 1: I do. I thank everything. My podcast, though, is do people? I mean, what does gratitude do for your energy and how can you continue to grow that good feeling of gratitude? That's my podcast. Okay, so this is where you take over. Have a good day. Speaker 2: Well, I think it's different for everybody. Gratitude has a very, very vibrational frequency when you stop and Collaborate and listen. Yes, okay, yes, okay, and reflect on the appreciation or gratitude for where you're at and what you're doing and what you've accomplished and what you've achieved. It will toggle many perspectives, in a positive way, for sure. Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a very, very high vibrational place to get to. There's different levels of it. Speaker 2: Oh, I totally agree with that. You know, life is sectioned. For me to understand things, I section it into what I call the pie of life, and each category has its own little. Speaker 1: Oops, oops, pardon me . Okay, and each category has its own little Oops, oops, pardon me Wow. Not once but twice. Speaker 2: Each category has its own slice of pie, so you can be have achieved it in other areas , but being able to have awareness of the gratitude and the frequency of that, in whatever area, will automatically raise your vibration. So it is definitely a good practice to have I agree. I think the ultimate goal would be to get to a place where you can find the gratitude in all areas, because that takes your whole body and your whole mind and your whole energy as a whole to a different frequency. Then in turn, that will begin to create a whole different reality because you're at a different frequency. So gratitude's really high up there, right along with joy and excitement. Yes, so here's where we were in a business conference we just got back late last night, you know, joy and excitement, yes, so here's where you know. Speaker 1: We were in a business conference. We just got back last late last night and, um, and the business conference, there were these things they call breakout meetings and in one of those meetings he talked about the eight steps of a servant leader. Speaker 2: And I think there should be nine. But that's just me, and what should be nine? I think number one should be self. Speaker 1: Self, I agree. Speaker 2: Because if you're depleted or you're not taking care of your own beliefs, patterns and programs, then you're going to not evaluate and respond to the outside situation, circumstances and events in the highest and best way that you probably could. You're going to be more emotionally reactive. Speaker 1: I agree. Speaker 2: If you're not taking care of yourself, if you're overtired because you're not getting enough rest, if you're not maintaining work-life balance and you're working overtime because you can't get everything done in a day that you wanted to and you're in a self-practice of keeping yourself happy, whole and balanced, then it's going to be very hard to accomplish those eight things because you're not going to have patience. You're going to be triggered very easily and triggered in an emotional way. Be triggered very easily and triggered in an emotional way. And whenever you're triggered in those lower vibrational emotions, you will then go into a spontaneous reaction rather than a thought through response and that can sometimes accelerate an already lit situation, rather than being able to put the flames out or take the flames away Servant leadership is not just for others, it's for yourself as well. Yeah, you know, in a lot of those things, servant leadership was defined as taking care of other people, servant leadership was defined as taking care of other people, but I think that the number one key thing is to remember is that we're people too. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: And if we don't take care of ourselves, how the hell can we take care of somebody else? Speaker 1: Right when the you know the first the first thing. Speaker 2: I'm sorry. Can we just acknowledge if we don't take care of ourselves, how the hell can we take care of somebody else? No, I totally agree with you. Speaker 1: I did acknowledge it already. I totally agree with it. I just felt the need to repeat you are correct, I think taking care of yourself should be number one. But in those steps the first one he said was a good listener, and I think that applies to us as ourselves as well, and this is where I'm kind of in that place of you're right it's time to listen to ourselves and say, you know, thank you for doing this, or hey, I need to work on this and have the complete, 100% reciprocated thought within your own being and being a listener, because if you can't listen to yourself, how are you going to listen to others? Speaker 2: Well, yeah, because how easy would it have been. You know, and I think here here's what I'm trying to convey when you're in the shower and you're doing your contemplation, AKA meditation, whatever, then, instead of being able to recognize that feeling of appreciation or gratitude, how easy is it even if you are grateful and you have that small fleck of gratitude in the moment, if you're inundated with all the tasks and the chores and the humanness of life and work and family how easy would it be to skate right over that? and ignore it and not acknowledge it and not just stop for a minute and smell the proverbial roses and really honor that gratitude. It would have been very easy this morning to you know, be in there washing your hair, washing your body, have that sensation, come across you briefly and ignore it and not really give it its due, because you're thinking about because you're not listening to yourself what all you've got to do and you're not really giving your ears to yourself or your body, or how often has it been that you're exhausted? and you know that the time clock has run out and you keep saying , okay, but if I just do one more hour, I'll get this project done, instead of being able to say you know what I'm tired, I'm going to clock out and I'm going to go get some rest. And that will be there tomorrow , because there are no night paper fairies that come in and handle the pile of paperwork. And guess what? You get there in the morning and that pile of paper is still there waiting on you. Speaker 1: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, I totally agree with you. You know the. Speaker 2: We have a new voice at the door. Speaker 1: Who's that? Speaker 2: I'm not. Is that Orr? I'm not sure if it's Orr or Willow, but someone has learned to communicate at the studio door. Speaker 1: Just like the other cat communicate at the studio door. Speaker 2: I just like the other cat, so we recently had a cat sitter when we went on our business trip to the Carolina. I never can remember. Speaker 1: North or South? Speaker 2: So I just called the Carolina and he didn't quite. I didn't convey the assignment. So in the studio we have one of our cats that is Special needs. Yeah, special needs, I guess, is the best way to put it. She gets to come in here to have like a reprieve from everybody else because she kind of gets picked on. But I said she's the only cat that gets to come in. So we came home late last night . He had the studio door cracked, so now all the other cats know what it is like in here. Speaker 1: So I wonder if the area has been violated. Speaker 2: It's very calm in here. Lots of stones, lots of noise reduction, and so now they've all experienced it. So now everybody wants to come, everybody wants to. Lots of stones, lots of noise reduction, and so now they've all experienced it. Speaker 1: So now, everybody wants to come in, everybody wants to be in the studio. Speaker 2: All the cats want to come in and meditate in the space. So, we have a new cat voice for the editor. Speaker 1: Yeah, that'd be Orb At the door Yep, I think it's Orb, and so being a good listener was the number one thing, and I think that applies to ourselves and others. But if we don't listen to ourselves and we skip over even the little things, it can compile. Speaker 2: It can. Speaker 1: And make you not a good listener at all and, like you said, and change your emotional structure that will make you react in ways that you wouldn't normally react. Speaker 2: Right. Speaker 1: And number two in that was empathy and understanding. Having empathy for others, having an understanding for other people's feelings and emotion, and that applies with listening, and I think you know being empathetic to yourself is just as important as it is for others. Speaker 2: Well, yeah, we can talk about that is just as important as it is for others. Well, yeah, we can talk about that, because if you're overtired and you've put in a lot of hours that week for a company, for example, and you're exhausted, your empathy will be covered up by almost a resentment. Why should I be empathetic to you? I am exhausted and I've put in 40 extra hours this week to get this project done. Who's in line to be empathetic for me? Right, instead of saying you know this can really wait and I'm really tired and I need to go take care of myself, then that resentment can easily be dissolved or maybe never even be created, which then gives space for you to be not a victim but an empathetic service individual to others, because you've given yourself the same permission. Speaker 1: I agree, I totally agree, and the understanding part of that is understanding that it's just important to create balance within our own emotions to be able to be a leader for others, right, and if they? Speaker 2: see that you're doing self-care. Speaker 1: They will too. Speaker 2: Then when you? I guess what I'm trying to say is, if you're going to preach it but then not do it, then that's seen as well. No, no, totally If you're not taking care of your own, but you're preaching it, and it's not evident by your actions and your behaviors. Speaker 1: It's going to be hard for your crew, whether it be family, work, whatever to trust and follow your leadership if you're a hot mess, totally agree , because number three on that was to foster uh, healing or um it, because you know the in the presentation he didn't actually go all the way down the list for everything but the number three . He skipped over a couple of them, because number three is fostering healing on the process of the servant leader, and that is the same thing. You foster the spot. Listen to yourself, you have empathy for yourself, like you just said. We say this all the time. Actually, you say I'm going to take a nap and that's okay because that's having empathy for yourself. Speaker 2: Well, yeah, even at work, because that's having empathy for yourself. Well, yeah, even at work. If I have an employee come and say, hey, can I grab some overtime so that I can reorganize, I will say to that person, okay, well, what has your work-life balance look like this week? How many of your life hours have you already devoted to work , and is it time to take a break ? And can that wait till next week? Right, and I make them. I don't make anybody do I recommend strongly that they stop and look at it by bringing it to their awareness. Right and I think, being, I think being a manager in not only work life, but in a partnership with a friend or an intimate partner such as a significant other or spouse. I think that is a key role to have is if you see that an individual is not honoring themselves within it, especially if their personality is beginning to show signs of tired , stressed resentment, whatever. Speaker 1: Well, you've said that to me. Speaker 2: I think it's our job to stop and bring it to their awareness, no matter what the Yo , you're working too much, take a break. Yeah, no matter what the venue is, whether it be at work or in a marriage, in a relationship as a friend, I think it's our duty to say hey, that can probably wait till tomorrow, because you're kind of showing some signs of aging. Speaker 1: Well, you know, it's kind of funny because it's almost like you're reading the list, because the next part of it is building a sense of awareness. You know, you build that sense, you build that community, you build that dialogue of what the next steps are in life. And I think that it's like you're following the line, even though I think understanding should be before fostering healing, because for you to foster healing, you got to kind of understand where people are. Like you said, you asked the questions. When so many comes to you in overtime, before you answer that question you want to make sure you have an understanding of what they have going on or yourself. Right, I totally agree, and well , I am a channel. I agree. Speaker 2: As are you and anybody else. Speaker 1: And when you build an awareness of. Speaker 2: Where's the remote? Speaker 1: What do you mean? The remote? Speaker 2: I'm a channel. Speaker 1: Oh yeah. Speaker 2: Where's the button? Speaker 1: Wrong button. That was the wrong button. We need the want, want one yeah , yeah, yeah, that was a bad dad joke. That was a bad, bad, bad dad joke. My inner being is saying, oh my god, did that really just come out? But you threw me off for a loop there. And so, building the awareness of each section of this as you go it's going to, when you do it for yourself and our guidance as leaders, we should be establishing a pattern of growth . Speaker 2: Yeah, so can we back up a second? Speaker 1: Sure. Speaker 2: Because what I hear currently there's a couple of questions out in the collective. So what if you are that hourly employee, such as like a housekeeper, who has to come in clock in specific hours of the day, needing to provide some self-care, but they've got to go to work and they've got to be accountable for the number of hours they have committed to giving? How can they modify their reality to eke out rest without calling in or without not showing up to work? Speaker 1: Well, what I have discovered? What about? Speaker 2: us, the little people . What if we can't just call in and not go to work for a mental health day? That's what I hear conversating out there A mental health day. Speaker 1: That's funny. I think the part of that is that fostering awareness and they have to make themselves aware of their time off, Because the reality is they only spend themselves aware of their time off, you know, because the reality is is they only spend a third of their day with us. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And if they are that tired, then they're. Speaker 2: They spend 16 hours away from here, right, and that would be what I would suggest is , if there's areas of your pie that you can't really modify, like you know, there's areas of your pie that you can't really modify, Like you know, a regular hourly employee can't really change the way their day looks at work Right Once they clock in . Those hours are delegated to the company construct. But what they can do is they can modify their home life. Yes, you know their home life. Yes, you know. Spend a little bit of extra time giving yourself permission to rest and relax, doing nothing so that you can recoup some of that energy. Speaker 1: I mean, even we do that, we do it all the time. The dishes can wait. Yeah, the dishes aren't. Speaker 2: I mean it's not that Nobody's going to die if the dishes don't get done today. Speaker 1: Right, the world's not coming to an end, if there's a stack of dishes in the sink. Speaker 2: Give yourself permission to go veg out and watch your favorite TV show, because that's what gives you back that moment of mind relaxation or physical body relaxation. Find areas where you can do that. If you find yourself extra tired, make a vow to yourself that you're going to let the dishes wait and go to bed early and get some extra rest. Speaker 1: Well, that falls right into the empowering growth , because if we're humanly exhausted and we're not identifying or have empathy for ourself or listening to our body , then you're going to drain it. You're going to get tired humanly, not energetically. Humanly you will get tired. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And when you get tired, when you're empowering the people, as leaders, to understand and have a greater perception of what their life is like. You know that is growth and that's like you know that is growth. And that's where you know the empowering growth side is because you're empowering yourself and we give permission through identification. We do all the time. We tell people all the time well, you know, let's do this, let's try this, or whatever that is. Speaker 2: But you don't understand. I have to go home, I've got three kids. I have to go home, I've got three kids, I've got to cook supper, and if I don't do the laundry, it piles up and I just don't have time. Speaker 1: I understand you have 16 hours off, though. Speaker 2: What is your advice to me? Speaker 1: My advice to you is to figure out simple solutions, you know do laundry. Speaker 2: What if I'm too inundated in the concept that I can't? Speaker 1: Well, I mean, I don't really have a complete answer for that, I'm just telling you Pick me pick me Okay, Dr Jenny. Speaker 2: Why so? I want to remind you that empowering the kids to have some independence is a constant thing, and it makes them feel really, really good when you say to them okay, listen up, you guys are responsible for supper, and supper then becomes instead of this big, huge meal that you have to cook and prepare. Let them make supper and make a fun game out of it, even if it ends up being peanut butter and jelly. Let them do that and they get such a level of prowess and independence from hey we cooked supper. Speaker 1: Yeah, we made supper for everybody. Speaker 2: Everybody enjoyed it you might even have that be a once a week or twice a week thing, but have no opinion or expectation as to what it looks like. And so if supper ends up being, you know, popcorn out of the microwave and reese's pieces, you, you got to embrace that, especially if they're happy and joyful about having make some feel good. Yeah, like your actions sometimes being modified modified by yourself on how things should work will actually bring such a level of joy to others. And looking at that, and so by having the kids do supper lets you just take that snippet of time where you can relax, yeah, and it gives them such a pleasure to help and then what you're cultivating is they. Speaker 1: They got joy out of it they say no, they're asking you, can I do supper? Asking you, can I do supper at night, mom? Can I do supper at night mom? Speaker 2: Well then, whenever they become teenagers, that's logged as such an enjoyable thing that they do. They'll mark that off their calendar. They'll mark that day off their calendar. That, hey, on Fridays we cook supper for our parents or for the family, or whatever, and it will cultivate a tradition and in the family you know when I'm having issues with time management. Speaker 1: I used to train this is do less, more and like. Because this used to drive me nuts, my daughter would let the her laundry pile up for the entire freaking week yeah and next thing, you know she's got two freaking piles or three loads of laundry she has to do on a saturday. And and when I would tell her, you know, if you were to just take the basket when it gets full, throw it in the washer, throw it in the dryer, get it done, then you're doing less, more often, but it doesn't take up your entire Saturday, right? And and then you know, same thing with with employees. You know, don't let your work pile up on you to where you end up having to work. Stay less more. Speaker 2: Yeah, and there's just one other perspective about that concept in the work world is really look at your plate yeah are you taking on somebody else's task? yeah because either a you have a belief that says, if it's going to be done right, I have to, I have to own it and do it myself right, and you're not letting that person fulfill their job description, or, b are you allowing that person to be a manipulator Right Of pretending like they don't do it correctly or don't know how, and so you're doing it yourself, rather than teaching them or re-educating them on how to do it, rather than teaching them or re-educating them on how to do it and then putting it back in their court to go and go forth, young man, and show me how you can get this done well, yeah, I mean you must be. Speaker 1: I think you're reading my thing, because the next step of that is assistance in conceptualizing the reality yeah and that is what it is you you know because here here are some I know some proven things about the labor force. One is the 15 minutes after the 15 minute break is useless and if you're taking, um, a 20 minute break, a little extended break, you're extending that time because it takes people a little bit of time to get going back into work. Well, that's why most people require everybody to be at work 15 minutes early, because of that concept. Speaker 2: Right. Speaker 1: And, and the more you do it, the better you get at it . But if you can help people to conceptualize, you know that little extra five minutes you spend on TikTok on your break. That puts you over. Your break time is actually prolonging you know your day because you're not working for that five minutes and and those little things add up, that less, more, that all it all adds up. And if assisting in people to conceptualize their reality, we have to, we as managers and we as people have to do that for ourselves and for others. Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think it's a good thing to teach, you know, and obviously a conservative way, and I'll use our employees, for example. If they're taking that extra five minutes, it's beneficial to go and explore that. And why are they? And it could be that they're overfilling their plate. So in our housekeeper situation you know, we provide housekeeping once a week to our residents is that housekeeper going in and they're over providing what we call light housekeeping by doing extra tasks and it's making their day feel over full, like they can't achieve their markers, their mile markers, and so it's exhausting them or making them overtired. So, teaching them the same concepts look at your plate. Yeah, have you overfilled your plate? Because you have some belief that you've got to be an over server. Right, because it independence and life purpose are important, no matter what age. You're at 100% and finding those moments where you hold people accountable for the things they should and could be doing for themselves, even if they don't want to sometimes, is the healthiest way to go about it. Speaker 1: I totally agree. Speaker 2: And not being the fixer of all things. Speaker 1: Don't be an enabler yeah, being becoming an enabler of bad things. Speaker 2: Society calls it an enabler, codependent. Yeah, don't play in those those worlds. Speaker 1: But Well, you shouldn't do that anywhere in life, with your spouse, with your employers yeah, with your employee. You should not be codependent in any direction, because we're self, we're self-sustained beings, right, and if something is taking our independence away, it is unhealthy. If something is taking our ability to fend for ourself and have a purpose, then that is unhealthy right, which is very different than co-creating. Totally agree. Speaker 2: Co-creating is much, much different than co-dependent . Speaker 1: Right. Yeah, I totally agree, and that's part of that. Conceptualizing their reality is making them understand that life. You can't make excuses for life when you're creating a harder life out of your own choices. You've got to be able to listen to yourself. You've got to be able to empathize with yourself and say you know why am I doing this if it's not required of me? Why am I doing this if it doesn't feel good? Speaker 2: Right, exactly, and you said it perfectly right. Why am I doing it? Looking at yourself. Speaker 1: That's right. Speaker 2: First to see what patterns, beliefs, programs you may be running that would cause you to react or act in that way to create that situation, because we create our own reality and that's a very, very good example of how we create our own reality, and that's a very, very good example of how we create our own reality. It's not that that person did it to you. Is that you inadvertently be, by being unaware, have created a situation where your plate may be over full, because you inadvertently created a codependent situation, because you have a belief that in order to be a good person, for example , I got to be an overachiever, or you know, or they're concerned about what it looks like for them later in life if they don't do something. Speaker 1: And the reality is that's where no two of us are alike, and when we do something that creates a codependent nature, then it becomes a negative habit. And when you create that habit, it can become difficult to actually see what you've created , right which is where we come in. That's what we do, the Merck. Speaker 2: Centers. Speaker 1: I agree, I totally agree. Speaker 2: We work with clients all the time and we have appointments open and available. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: In person mobile via phone. Speaker 1: Yeah, totally, totally with you. Speaker 2: That help people be able to look at that and see that. Speaker 1: Yeah, the next step is foresight and planning. And so when you can see that, when, when we, as servant leaders to ourselves and others, um, when we can bring to somebody's reality what the you know, the conceptualization of their reality, then we can assist in planning and having foresight on future behaviors, where you don't create those bad habits but you create good habits. Speaker 2: Right, which brings it all the way back around to that then feeds into a healthy lifestyle. Speaker 1: Yeah, but a balanced lifestyle. Right, but more a balanced lifestyle. Speaker 2: Right in a more balanced way. Speaker 1: Balanceability- which also falls into the next step of that, which is stewardship and own responsibility. And so when we get into stewardship like you and I constantly do it all day, every day we are helping people, directing people, making them see their reality where they are , and when you get to the point, to where they can. Speaker 2: Does that mean you're passing out drinks on a plane? Speaker 1: Sometimes. Yeah, it depends on if I'm asleep or not, because if I'm asleep, then I'm passing out drinks on a plane that I'm dreaming. Speaker 2: What is stewardess? Stewardship, what is that? Speaker 1: Guiding somebody. It's like a personal guide. A steward helps people through things, oh, and when they get to a point, to where we've made them? We went through each one of these steps. We've learned to listen to ourselves and others. We've learned to have empathy and understanding for ourselves and others. Then then we start getting to a healing process, um, and we start building the structure within us to think in different ways. That creates a balance and it empowers us to we, you know, powers them and us to to have growth and opportunity within that thought process. And when you have growth and opportunity, it really empowers you to be more of that individual that sees the whole picture. That sees the whole picture and then, because we assist with conceptualizing reality and the vision of what their future looks like, they get a better understanding of it and actually work through processes daily in a much easier and more precise way. Speaker 2: So what was the last one? Stewardship, and what? Speaker 1: No. Then the next one is the foresight planning. You know where they have a better foresight of their reality and they plan better. You know they don't take that extra five minutes on their break. They do less, more. They become more balanced within it, because now they're doing this stuff a little bit here, a little bit there. It's a whole lot easier to swallow a small pill than it is a great big one. And so when you're doing a little bit of this, you're doing less and more through planning and the foresight of your reality, then you can become empowered more and become responsible for your reality. I think, and it's steward to others. Speaker 2: I think in the foresight part of it, reminding people that one of the key components of that is if you don't know how, don't hesitate to communicate. Speaker 1: Totally. Speaker 2: And utilize the resources and ask how. Speaker 1: Yes. Speaker 2: Hey, I've got this situation. I'm trying to figure out how to do this. Do you have any suggestions? Speaker 1: Clear and concise communication. Speaker 2: Whether it be your partner in your personal life, whether it be a best friend a co-worker, your boss, your manager, your child. Don't be hesitant to go and ask for help, because nowhere in the book of life which doesn't exist, by the way does it say in there. Speaker 1: Oh man, we don't have a handbook for this. No, I need some SOPs for life. Speaker 2: The handbook for the dearly departed. Speaker 1: Standards of operation for our life. We need those. Speaker 2: That was from a movie , by the way. What the Handbook for the Dearly Departed? Speaker 1: Oh, that was from a movie. Oh, what was that movie? Hang on, I got it, beetlejuice. Speaker 2: Yay, give yourself a round of applause, yay. Speaker 1: I have some movie questions. I answered Yay For those of you that are joining us. I have some movie questions. Speaker 2: I answered Yay For those of you that are joining us newly. We give James a hard time because he has no movie trivia knowledge that sticks in his head. Speaker 1: I just don't contain that knowledge for some reason. Speaker 2: So we make fun of him because it's quite fun. Speaker 1: Yeah, they do make fun of me a lot. Anyway, getting back to the topic at hand, and the last step of this is clear and concise communication can I just back up ? Speaker 2: yeah, yeah, go ahead, not not to, not to badger it down, but don't forget to ask for help totally and stay in that humility and humble place that you don't know everything none of us do, and so always be a student. Of life Of life. Speaker 1: And everything. Speaker 2: And utilize your resources. I know that I've heard you say some rich, successful person said it's not what you know, it's who you know. And what was meant by that is I don't have to know everything, I just have to know who to call. Speaker 1: Right, well, that was . Yeah. That was the now president once said in a seminar I went to that I'm smart enough to know to surround myself with people smarter than me. Speaker 2: Oh, humpy-trumpy. Speaker 1: Yeah, humpy-trumpy, and he a great businessman. He has some good, some great knowledge back then and his, I think, in this in particular one is actually will kind of tie into this, because he said he discovered how to be, to look smarter. How do you say it? I discovered how to look smarter by having people around me that are smart. Speaker 2: Yeah, and if you can think about it, if you are a, I'm going to loop it back around . Speaker 1: Use your tools. Yeah, use your tools. Speaker 2: I'm going to loop it back around for you. Speaker 1: Come on, you got it. Speaker 2: And you're going to love it. Perfect, if you think about it. If you are a servant and every one of us is, if you are a servant and every one of us is, no matter the level of employment or relationship type that you're in, if we're all servants of each other and of ourselves, if you stop and realize, hey, I'm not educated in this, but who can I reach out to? You may very well reach out to that person and find out that they absolutely love sharing their knowledge, but they were a little hesitant because maybe they were running a belief that says, oh my gosh. Speaker 1: Nobody wants to hear me. Speaker 2: Who's going to want to hear what I have to say? Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: And by you reaching out to them and saying you know what? Hey, I know you have a lot of knowledge in this area. Can you help me figure this out ? I need a solution. It's jamming me up. Then you've just given them the opportunity to fulfill, perhaps , their joy and excitement. Speaker 1: And that's a true. And excitement, and that's a true. And their opportunity to become a servant leader. Speaker 2: And that changes their vibrational frequency. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: And that is then, in turn, truly the definition of being a servant, because now you've given them the opportunity to turn around and reciprocate being a servant to you, which then reciprocates that high vibrational energy of we. We just like to help. We like to help because that energy, that frequency, it is very high and it feels good. Speaker 1: Yeah, it makes you very grateful, like we started out with yeah, well, that's great. I think that was a great podcast. Speaker 2: Did you go back to the last? Speaker 1: one. Speaker 2: The last one kept clear and concise communication yeah, let's visit that one for just a sec, there's some okay collective questions. Okay, that are going to come up . Shoot, give it to me. Bang, bang, you're dead pressure. Do you then go to bed? Speaker 1: you don't remember saying that as a child oh my gosh, I don't think I've ever heard that in my life. What kind of childhood did you have? Bang, bang, you're dead. Brush your teeth and go to bed. What? Speaker 2: I don't know. There's just some little rhyme we made up and and when somebody said shoot, okay, I'm batting zero I'll keep my day job comedian? I am not. I thought it was quite an odd rhyme. Speaker 1: Anyway, go ahead. Speaker 2: Clear and concise communication yeah, clear and concise communication. I do you have anything? Well, we preach it all the time you know. We preach clear and concise communication all the time, to ourselves, to others but if you think that you're being clear and concise and you're really not, what would be evidence of that? Speaker 1: Well, obviously, if you get no response in a positive manner from your communication, or if the things because here's the problem with clear and concise communication. And then here's the positive when you clear and concise communication to an individual, another person on the proper level that they communicate, it will be much more successful. And when you clear and concise communicate to somebody not on their level, it'll be a blank slate and they don't they. They will not accomplish what you want to do. And you have to identify their communication levels. Speaker 2: Not understanding the assignment. Speaker 1: Yeah, they would look at you and go like, like, if I went up to a a nurse and said, hey, the nuclear reactor is going to blow up in 10 minutes, would you go fix that? That nurse is going to have zero clue what the hell to do. And so it's about a level of communication on the same level and taking yourself to that spot for them and in within the communication, concisely communicating at their level, whatever that is in their way to make for them to have a better understanding. Speaker 2: Right and remembering that nonverbal communication is a form of communication as well , or the lack of it. And I'll give you an example Our assistants now have a code word that says communicating, because we go and we serve coffee to our residents as our way of kind of mingling with them and getting out in the community. And what was happening, I guess , apparently on their shifts between the administrative assistant and the two assistants , is that they had one individual or two that weren't paying attention visually to when the other one went back to go and do the coffee at the time that it's supposed to be done, and they then ended up doing a majority of the dining room coffee and it was aggravating to them to be the only one doing coffee. Yeah, so then they stopped and had a communication session and brought that to the awareness of the other one or the other two who weren't even aware that they were doing it yes, totally agree and so making sure that if you've got somebody that is not participating in something. It could be that they're it's. It could be the situation like I just explained. They're not doing it on purpose because they want to pile all the crap on you. They just may not be as observant or as aware of their reality as perhaps you are Totally agree. And so don't hesitate to communicate and clarify every single situation, even if it is a topic that you find challenging to talk about. Just find a way to talk about it in a softer way or in a more empathetic way. Speaker 1: Well, you know, I teach or find a mediator that can help you talk about it. Yeah, we teach or I just recently taught in one of the sessions that when you're having issues with a communication with a co-worker, a significant other, a spouse or whatever, it's okay to create a word that draws attention. It's the fact that they're saying I'm communicating. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: It's not a fact of the word or what it is. It's about identifying and getting their attention with a word. Well, I think what? Speaker 2: happened first is that the person identified that it was bugging them and creating a perception that they didn't care for, agreed and not buying into the monkey mind lie of they just are lazy and don't want to do anything and so they're piling all this stuff on me. You could very easily buy into that statement and run that lie if you didn't really have an ability to look at the situation , because it may be that they're not doing it to you. They just are not as aware or as observant, and it is okay to bring things to people's awareness. Totally agree, just do it in a compassionate way. Speaker 1: Totally agree with this. I feel good and it doesn't just encompass individuals. Speaker 2: It could be companies . Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree. Speaker 2: You could very easily , you know, yeah, I agree, you could very easily write up an email to the person above you in a very professional way. If you saw that a process wasn't working and you saw that you have a solution that you've kind of tried out and it's working, you could formulate an email on a company level and putting it in a suggestion box. Don't hesitate to put things out there and have clear, concise communication on a corporate level or on a group level either. Speaker 1: Totally agree with you. I'm going to run the same page. That's a great. I think that was a really good summation of leadership to others and yourself. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: I think that's great, because if you communicate with yourself concisely, then you know you just go right back through the steps, right, and it's a repeat, rinse and repeat type thing. Speaker 2: And it brings it all the way back to gratitude and appreciation. Yes, totally agree, it's always back to gratitude and appreciation. Speaker 1: Yes, totally agree. Speaker 2: It's always good to stop and be. Have that communication. Speaker 1: Brings it right back to gratitude. That's right. It'll make your life easier and so you'll be more grateful into your reality. Speaker 2: Remember to tell yourself how grateful you are of yourself. Speaker 1: Yes, and the reality that create Great. Speaker 2: I'm so grateful that my lungs breathe for me. I reality of the crate Great. I'm so grateful that my lungs breathe for me. Speaker 1: I don't have to think about it, I know right. Can you imagine having to think about breathing, right? It's like man you'd be like. Your entire day would be breathe, breathe. Speaker 2: You wouldn't hardly get anything done. Speaker 1: Right, you wouldn't, you'd be thinking about that all the time. But anyway, and don't forget to look at our website, wwwthemerccentersorg, and you can also look up our social media and it's at the Merc Centers Like, follow and share. If you really do like it, leave us a comment, drop us a call, give us an email, whatever. You can get all that on our website. Speaker 2: And ring the bell too . For what Notifications Get the? Speaker 1: notifications when we upload things. Yeah, sure, thank you all for listening. Speaker 2: And everybody have one awesome day. Love you, bye-bye, bye-bye, thank you.