Living Boldly at Every Stage

Speaker 1: Well, thank you all for tuning into the show today. We're back in the studio. It's actually Christmas Day. We're recording a podcast on Christmas for you guys and we hope you all had an awesome time with your family and friends. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And celebrate this societal Todd holiday. Merry Christmas Happy holidays, give away all your gifts and go in debt for four months. No, first kidding. Hey, we hope you really enjoyed it. I'm just repeating my history, because that's how Christmas always went. Speaker 2: Yikes. Speaker 1: I'm just playing. Speaker 2: Mine went a little differently actually. Speaker 1: Yeah, you had a good Christmas I planned for my Christmases. Oh, you did. Speaker 2: Yeah, like I put money back. It was all strategic and I was one of those that would shop. Like in January I begin looking for specific items for the kids and stuff. Speaker 1: You mean the stuff that when they opened their presents and they were disappointed because they didn't get it, so you made sure and got it. Speaker 2: Mine weren't disappointed. Speaker 1: Okay. Speaker 2: I thought about mine. It was very methodical. Speaker 1: I know you're very methodical about a lot of things . Speaker 2: It was very planned out. Speaker 1: That's that nurse in you the. Speaker 2: The christmas is real themed based on the vacation we were going to take that year wow, that's like it was all thought out thing like if we were going to the beach that summer for our family vacation. Then part of their christmas was new beach towels, new beach toys, that's way. Speaker 1: And then some of their. Speaker 2: Christmas was new beach towels, new beach toys. Speaker 1: That's way too deep for me. Speaker 2: And then some of their Christmas was things they asked for. Speaker 1: That's deep, that's pretty extravagant. Speaker 2: And I planned out how much each thing cost, and then I put the money back and then we did the whole Black Christmas, where you know you. Speaker 1: Black Friday. Speaker 2: Yeah, what did I? Speaker 1: say what is whole Black Christmas where you know you. Speaker 2: Black Friday. Yeah, what did I say? What is a Black Christmas, black Friday? Speaker 1: Black Friday shopping . Yeah, I thought maybe there was a new kind of Christmas I didn't know about. There may be, Well anyway. So what did you get for Christmas? Speaker 2: I got a new cello a new cello, oh yeah cool we decided to bark upon a new adventure we did which is to do a musical we're always bark upon a new adventure, trying to do something we haven't done before . That's always how we kind of just live life Either go somewhere we haven't gone before or learn something we haven't learned before. Speaker 1: Like we're going in March to the Mayan ruins. Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure. Speaker 1: That's cool. That's already booked. I'm excited. Yeah, doing a little cruise which actually is a great segue into my topic. Speaker 2: What did you get for Christmas? Speaker 1: I got an electric guitar. Speaker 2: Yeah. So we decided we were going to go on a journey I actually, it was my- turn. Speaker 1: No, it was kind of. We were kind of. It was kind of usual. It was my turn to decide. Speaker 2: Yeah, after our bowling extravaganza it was kind of my turn to decide and I said I think I'm going to learn how to play the cello. Speaker 1: And you were like, okay and here we go off to the music store. Actually, what she said was is I think my new adventure is going to be I want to learn how to play the cello. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And I was like, hey, that sounds like a great adventure. So off to the music store, we went. Speaker 2: Off to the music store. We went. Speaker 1: Bought cellos and lessons and electric guitars and books and all sorts of things. Speaker 2: Yep we did? Speaker 1: I've already played my first song. Speaker 2: He has, he is ahead of me. Speaker 1: Ha ha. She had to try and wear fingernails off so she could play the cello. Speaker 2: Had to lose the fake nails. Now they're chopped down to like little hooves. Speaker 1: Little hooves that like little hooves. Little hooves, that's your hooves. Well, anyway, it's a great segue into the topic of the day for me. Speaker 2: Okay. Speaker 1: So I was telling one of the people at our employment what we had decided to do for Christmas and she said the response. The response was gosh, is there anything you don't do? And I was like what you mean? We live right you know, we have free enough energy in our, in our reality that we're not scared to go try things, even in our 50s. We don't care. Speaker 2: Reality that we're not scared to go try things, even in our 50s. Speaker 1: We don't care, are we ? Speaker 2: 50. We are in our 50s. Speaker 1: Oh wow, yeah, I know right, golly gee man we're in the bottom part of our 50s, but we're in there I still feel like I'm in my 20s yeah, I know we're on the inside yeah, I agree I feel like we act like we're still in our 20s and she said said so the response was she was like well, I mean, at what point are you going to slow down? Speaker 2: Never. Speaker 1: I was like never. I said it's not that we do a lot. Speaker 2: The only thing that's going to hold us back, man, is six foot of dirt. Speaker 1: Yeah, I know right. It's not that we do a lot, it's just you all have been taught to not do anything. I mean once a year or once in a lifetime, you go learn something, you go to college. Why stop? Speaker 2: Right, exactly. Speaker 1: I mean, we choose to live, we don't choose to sit around and wait, right. And so the whole conversation got into this topic of fear and she was like oh, I could never learn to play the cello, I could never learn the guitar, I'm too old. Speaker 2: Wow. Speaker 1: And so that's where the topic went to. Speaker 2: That's crazy. Speaker 1: And I was like so you're scared to fail. What's going to happen? What's the worst thing that could happen if you failed trying to learn to play the guitar? Speaker 2: I know, pick me, pick me One of those rubber mallets like whack-a-mole is going to come down and whack her on the head. Speaker 1: I know right, I'm just like, and so our conversation rolled into fear. And I'm not going to lie Like last night I performed for people. I actually played a song in front of a public audience last night and remember I just got this on Saturday. It is now Wednesday. I didn't play it until Sunday. I learned my first song on Monday and it's an easy Christmas song, it's not like an elaborate song. Speaker 2: What is it? It's Silent Night, yeah. Speaker 1: And so I played Silent Night last night and and I'm sure our social media person will put it up on our social media but we were I think that putting it up though shows everybody don't forget to just get out there. Speaker 2: Yeah, just get out there and live, it doesn't matter it, just we create our own mental limitations. Speaker 1: That's right and that's exactly where it went to. Was the fear I said. Do you realize that your own fear of failing is causing you from having expansion and learning something new? Speaker 2: Right. Speaker 1: And being who you want to be, Because we are taught in society to not follow our ambitions for some reason. You know we get taught it's weird if you want to ride a bicycle at 30. That's not one of those fancy bicycles where you're in this club and you're got a whole bunch of old people and y'all were in tight, weird pants. And funny hats and funny hats and you're flying down the side of some back road somewhere in a club. So it's weird if you don't ride , if you ride bicycles any other way when you're an adult, in a club. Speaker 2: So it's weird if you don't ride. If you ride bicycles, any other way. Speaker 1: When you're an adult, right, and if you just want to go get on a bmx and ride around, then that guy's weird like. I watched a video on youtube of a guy that's 50 years old that's just learning how to compete in bmx that fancy bmx riding, yeah and all the comments were below. It was like yeah, he's too old, he's not going to make it, he can't do it. Oh my god, look at, this is ridiculous. You know, one of them was like man, somebody get him a bottle of geritol and show him where his place is in his recliner. I was like that's ridiculous why do people? Speaker 2: why do people do? Speaker 1: that I know it is, it's crazy and so it's crazy the programming that is going on inside people's heads that they've been taught that at a certain age, life has to look a certain way, right, you know, like she said to me oh, I just couldn't do it. I mean, I don't think I have the ability anymore, I'm too old . Speaker 2: Well, yeah, you keep telling yourself that, of course . Speaker 1: I mean, and I've asked her like three or four times what is the? Speaker 2: worst thing that could happen. Yeah, and what'd she say? Speaker 1: She just couldn't come up with an answer. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: She was so shell-shocked that I actually said that to her. Yeah, and it falls back on fear . They're scared of failing, or they're scared of being looked at differently, right, and all that is is all restriction. Speaker 2: Yeah, that's called them esteem. Speaker 1: Them esteem. Yeah, okay, what does that explain? Speaker 2: Well, it's the opposite of self-esteem. You're not building your own self-esteem by looking at yourself and analyzing yourself and allowing yourself room to expand and grow, because you're so busy building the esteem based on what them thinks. Speaker 1: Or what you think that they want you to look like. Speaker 2: Or what you think, they think, you think, they think, you think, they think, you look like there's a whole lot of thinking going on. Way too much thinking. Speaker 1: Somewhere in there. I think you said stink. I'm not sure they think you stink. You think you might think stink , I don't know. Speaker 2: Can we get some deodorant in here? There's a lot of stinking going on. Speaker 1: Yeah, and you're totally right. Like she's like oh my god, my son would give me such a hard time. I was like pick up a guitar, go play. About she's like because she said I've always wanted to learn to play a musical instrument do it, then why don't you? right, you're not getting any younger my son would make so much fun of me and then I'd be too embarrassed to play in front of other people and I'm like don't play in front of anybody, Just go around knowing that you have the confidence that you learned it. Speaker 2: Just do it for the self-esteem and the self-satisfaction. Speaker 1: Yeah, that's right. Have fun with it. Yeah, and so that's where my topic is today. Speaker 2: Okay, where do you want to take it? Speaker 1: I want to take it to the spot of of why we accept, as you call it them, steam yeah, Instead of doing what we do and or doing what we want to do when we want to do it Right, and what causes us to think. What everybody else thinks of us is more important than what we think of ourselves. Speaker 2: Yeah, this is one of those rabbit hole, twisted pretzel concepts. Speaker 1: Yeah, it can be. Speaker 2: Yeah, no, it is. Get your carrot sandwiches, folks. Speaker 1: So the where I would, where I wanted to start with it was, is this is cause there was a part of me, when we went to the music store was like yeah, dang, can I do this at my age? Speaker 2: yeah, I will say that when we went to the music store , and we were the oldest people in there, by the way I did not even recognize that. I went in knowing I want to play the cello. I went in, I got down to business, I made my decisions. I selected my equipment. I didn't I really had. I can't even tell you who was in the store. I was on an agenda, a personal mission. He showed me two instruments. I chose them. I asked okay, what other pieces and components do I need with it? He told me I made my decisions and I checked out and boom, I was done. I look up and you're still wandering around. Speaker 1: Well, I was torn, I was torn. Speaker 2: What are you doing? Speaker 1: And you're like well. Speaker 2: I can't. I can't decide if I want this instrument or that, or and you were still wandering around like not committing to one or the other. Speaker 1: You know, I was kind of torn because I was debating on the drums or the electric guitar or an acoustic guitar just the guitar period and because my son played the drums. You know, he got lessons when he was younger and I enjoyed beating around on him and there was a part of me that said maybe I should play the drums because I'm old and I have, you know, they have this societal fear in me of I can I, can I play the guitar, can I stay in rhythm, can I? Can my fingers even move that way anymore? Speaker 2: So you were having to kind of. Speaker 1: I was debating working through that age belief that yes, and then the guy behind the counter came around and he said, hey, let me show you these drums, and he took me in that little back room yeah and he took his hat off and I realized, damn, he's old. Speaker 2: He was like why did he not have any hair under his head? Speaker 1: he had a stocking cap on and he didn't look that old until he pulled his head off, his hat off and he took his glasses off. Speaker 2: Until he pulled his head out. Speaker 1: Until he pulled his head out, or else I'd just open my eyes, maybe I don't know. But we're in the back room and he takes his stocking cap and his sunglasses off and I was like, oh, I'm like how old are you man? And he said he was 65 or 66. How long have you been playing? Oh, about 10 years. I'm like, oh, okay, thank you, because I wanted to play the guitar. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: That's what I wanted to do, right? I mean, I want to learn both, but the more important one would be the guitar. Speaker 2: For me, yeah, so let me share with everybody the rest of the story. We'll probably end up with both . Speaker 1: Oh, I'm sure. Speaker 2: Because I had the harebrained idea that we are going to get rid of all of our furniture and make the living room into a music studio. Speaker 1: Yes, editor, you heard it right. She is giving away that Cindy Crawford home edition white leather couch and recliner. Speaker 2: And the coffee table and the coffee table and tables. Listen, I decided if I can get rid of all the furniture and make the living room a kickbox field for the kids when they were young. Speaker 1: A kickball, you mean. Speaker 2: Yeah, kickball, I can definitely get rid of the furniture now and make my living room into a music studio. Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm okay with that. Speaker 2: We don't really sit in there. Speaker 1: No, we don't use it, we don't really use that space for sitting. Speaker 2: We're normally either in our bed in the studio or on the patio. Speaker 1: That's all we. I mean what? Maybe twice in the last year we've sat in the living room and watched a movie. Speaker 2: Right yeah. Speaker 1: Everything else. We watch the movie in the bed. Speaker 2: Right. Speaker 1: Or we go to Cine Bistro which is awesome, by the way. Yes, hyde. Speaker 2: Park In Hyde Park. Speaker 1: Yeah, their food is good. Speaker 2: Their food is off the chain. Speaker 1: Yeah, it's good stuff . Speaker 2: Consistently. That's the thing. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: Is that we've been multiple, multiple times and every time without fail. No matter what we order, it's just spot on. Speaker 1: Speaking of that, the movie Wicked. Oh, what a disappointment that was. Speaker 2: I mean, are we supposed to be talking about that kind of stuff? Speaker 1: We can talk about anything we want. We're copyrighted. Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you know I was. I'll agree with you. I was disappointed. It was a musical and we knew that. Speaker 1: There was parts of it that was good, but man, the musical part, they were saying it just random, weird places. Speaker 2: Yeah, and then it's a part one. Speaker 1: But places, yeah, and then it's a part one, but don't give it away because there's people that haven't seen it. Speaker 2: No, no, no, there's a part one and Don't give it away , it's crazy. Speaker 1: Anyway, on a one to ten scale, it was a four for me. Speaker 2: Yeah, definitely. If I knew then what I know now, I would wait for it to come out on my TV and just watch it in my bed. Yeah, but the food was great. Speaker 1: The food was awesome. The food was amazing. I totally agree. Cine Bistro is the way to go. Yeah, it's not like the normal. Speaker 2: Popcorn and all that. Speaker 1: Cinemax where you go and eat, but I mean, the food is actually fine dining food. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: At a movie theater. Speaker 2: Right, it's fine. Dining food, yeah, at a movie theater, it's really. Yeah. The first time we went I actually had a butternut squash, what they call it I don't remember a butternut squash, some french word, pizarro, oh, oh, a pizzeo and it was what was ? Speaker 1: I don't remember. Speaker 2: It was really good. It was butternut squash and it had a little bit some sprigs of microgreens on the top with a hint of jalapeno, so you got a little bit of the afterburn, yeah. Speaker 1: It was good stuff. It was good. I personally prefer either the grilled chicken Caesar salad, which is completely not what you think in a grilled chicken Caesar salad. It's not a typical one. It's actually real Caesar dressing, anchovies, the whole shebang. Speaker 2: Yeah, Every time we go he comments on how good the Caesar dressing is. Speaker 1: And then last time I mean the last couple of times I've got the shrimp pasta. Yeah, it's really good too. Speaker 2: I was going to say, if he orders the same thing again, it's because it is good. You have to remember he has a chef background. So if he orders something more than once, then it definitely has several stars by it. Speaker 1: We're way off base here. Speaker 2: We are. Speaker 1: And I do have like 175,000 restaurant review followers on Google. That's crazy Anyway. So back on Google, that's crazy Anyway. So back on topic. Speaker 2: Back on topic, here we go. Speaker 1: So you know the fear. So we were talking about the them, esteem and differentiating ourselves and what holds us back and why do we allow that to happen? So that's your cue doctor. That's your cue doctor. Speaker 2: That's my cue. Speaker 1: It is. Speaker 2: Well, so there's a pre-rabbit hole concept and then there's a rabbit hole concept. So we are taught Wait a minute. Speaker 1: I didn't finish my story. Oh okay, I just thought of that him hanging on the on the music store story, and so I go in the back room wow, we're all over the place tonight. Well, yeah, yeah, it's been kind of a crazy couple days, but , um, actually it's been pretty fun. Actually I've had a pretty really fun since I've got my guitar. It's been pretty fun. Actually, I've had a pretty really fun since I've got my guitar. Speaker 2: It's been fun. I find my free time I feel like we have fun a lot of the time. Yeah, I agree, we do. Speaker 1: But anyway. So I go in the back room with this guy and he takes his hat off. Speaker 2: Right. Speaker 1: And he takes his sunglasses off. I'm like, oh, how old are you? And I think he said 65, 65 or 66 or whatever. Like how long have you been playing the drums? He said, oh, 10 years. And he's good. I mean he can play. He said I do it all the time. He's got three sets of drums he's got. He's got a set in his garage. He got a portable set he takes with him. That's always in his car and he has his main set. He goes to beating on these drums and he gets in just doing a great job, great beats. He's good. You know, he's showing me all his tricks and just flipping his drumsticks, yeah. And I said, well, thank you, you just told me what I need to do. And I walked out and I went to the guitars and then he walked over to me. He's like what man I mean? Speaker 2: what did I do? Speaker 1: What just happened I'm like. Well, I'm going to tell you I was debating in my mind if I am old enough to learn to play the guitar. Speaker 2: If I'm not too old. Speaker 1: If I'm not too old. Speaker 2: Not old enough. Speaker 1: Yeah, if I'm not too old to learn to play the guitar. And then you just showed me that at the age of 65, you learned to play the drums at 55. And so you just cleared the reality, or cleared my belief system, out of the way that I can learn to do that, because there's not too many things in this world I'm not good at. Yeah, and here I am. I was trying to make a decision between the drums and the guitar, and then you just tell me your life story in a matter of 10 seconds and make a decision for me so you could have quit playing the drums. You know, two minutes ago, and I cause I already made my mind up. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And so I walk out of the door and I go to the guitar place and then I'm debating on which guitar, and cause there's so many different ones in nowadays. Yeah, you know they're the Les Pauls and the Ibanez's and the Yamaha's and the um, uh, gibson's. You know they're electric acoustic. And then there's uh, what did he call them? Classical acoustics yeah, there's classical acoustics, there's 12 string, there's yeah, all these things right and so it took me a minute to figure out. I just know I wanted a classic electric guitar with an amp and, but I wanted a good one. I don't want, I don't want one that's going to, you know, need to be adjusted all the time yeah and and so the the guy behind the counter, you know was telling me what he's like 20 something. It was like oh yeah, this is a good one, if you want to play it . Then he starts naming off the nowadays bands or whatever and I'm like, bro, I don't even know who that is. I have no idea who you're talking about. I mean, I I'm looking at some Def Leppard, some Poison Right, and he's like oh yeah, I can play those too. But I'm like but who are you talking about? Anyway? So we went through and I finally chose this very beautiful Ibanez. Speaker 2: It is beautiful, I agree. Speaker 1: It's a blue tiger print. Speaker 2: Yeah, and they've got a black store amp. Speaker 1: Yeah, it's good stuff . Speaker 2: And it sounds really well, really good, and you're doing a phenomenal job. Speaker 1: I think I am. Yeah, I think I'm doing pretty good for three days or four days . Speaker 2: Whatever, it's been Progressing very rapidly. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: Ain't no sunshine when she's gone. Speaker 1: Well, maybe we'll do singing lessons next. Hey, I can auto-tune on this. I can auto-tune on that too. On the Black Star, I can actually turn the auto-tune and make myself sound good. Speaker 2: Okay. Speaker 1: Anyway. So I overcame my fears within it because I had an example in front of me. Now, thanks Spirit for that. Yeah, the part of it that I didn't understand is where did societal teach me that I'm too old to face my fears and do something I've always wanted to do? Speaker 2: And so that's now. Now we can go back. So two things spirit always has your back and will always put in place the things that you need to hear to guide you in the direction that will bring you the most joy, excitement, fulfillment, if you're ready to go in that direction and don't have any resistance, and so you were ready to hear what you needed to hear to be able to clear that belief out of the way . And that message was brought to you through the little drummer man. Yeah, and so that's a perfect example of how higher self information as we've talked about in other podcasts is able to come through when you're open and receptive to letting the information come in any form, not insisting that it has to come in a certain form. So I want to bring that to light , because we've talked about in other podcasts being open, that it doesn't have to come through the mind or your own ears, it can come from other people. Agreed, now we'll get back to the topic at hand of how do we get programmed societally in a situation like that, where age defines so many things in our belief systems. Because it does, yeah. Speaker 1: I agree. Speaker 2: I mean age and we work with the they elderly yes, but we don't treat them that way correct they come in here thinking they can't do things, and we come in here saying, oh yes, you can and you're gonna do them and we ain't doing them for you no, we're not handicapped. You're not crippled. You're not fragile frail. Speaker 1: You raised kids we ain't falling for that stinky diaper. Speaker 2: No more falling for that anyway. So how does it happen? Because like in like in your path and we'll use you for an example your great-grandmother played the upright bass. Speaker 1: My grandmother. Speaker 2: Your grandmother yeah my dad's mother, until she was 100 years old, 100 plus. Speaker 1: Yeah, 100 plus. Speaker 2: And was out grooving and cruising and doing. Speaker 1: Played. So where did you? Was playing the bass the day she died. Speaker 2: So where did you pick that up? Speaker 1: along the way, you know what I mean, oh you mean the belief, the belief. I don't know. You know, I think kind of well, let me actually let me back up. Uh, I do think that part of that, I believe, is in societal lifestyles. She had a completely different lifestyle than I did, you know. She lived a different life, and so I think, in the back of your mind, you get taught oh well, that which society teaches us, there's generations. Well, that generation was much different than our generation, and so I think that's where maybe some of that belief came in. Speaker 2: And then you come along and you watch your parents . Speaker 1: My dad still plays. Speaker 2: But you watch your mom and she's not quite as active in her life as she gets older. Like she lets age dictate her health, and my dad's just the opposite Her physical At least he didn't a few years ago, when we saw him last. Speaker 1: He didn't let age really dictate, dictate his life . Speaker 2: He did what he wanted to do yeah, but then we also watch others that are classified , as you know, geriatric elderly as they age, and we watch them limit themselves. And then we watch um tv shows where they show that the elderly people are in wheelchairs with lap blankets, not doing anything , or, if they are, they're getting in trouble by their children. Mom, you're too old, you don't need to be doing that. We watch it on TV. Speaker 1: Yeah, we see it every day too. Speaker 2: TV shows Right. That we watch it on tv, yeah, we see it every day too. Tv shows, um, right. But I'm just saying as a general whole, if you're not working with the aging population, right, where are people getting the programming? And I'm so I'm just giving you different examples of where it will come from. It comes from the people that you were raised with and around watching them and you're making decisions on. Okay well, I guess when I get 40, I won't be able to do that either, and you come to terms with it. So you log that as part of your definition. Okay, well, my aunt, for example, was using a walker by the time she was 57, because her back got old Because she was fat. Because her back got old. Speaker 1: Okay. Speaker 2: I mean when you're a kid, you don't know any of that, you just see it as she's hunched over now using a walker, and she looks old to you at 57, because when you're in your teens or even younger, that looks old to you it does. Speaker 1: I remember when I was 14. I remember thinking my dad turned 40. I was like god, that's old, dang. Speaker 2: He's old, 40 years old, that's old right and you go galloping up on 40 and you're like, whoa, this is not old? Speaker 1: no, it's not old at all, it's's crazy. Speaker 2: Pump the brakes, Batman, Sorry. Speaker 1: Dad, I made fun of you so much. Speaker 2: And so you begin to kind of create definitions of what old looks like and the things that you won't be able to do, based on what you witness going on around you, with your family, with acquaintances, with just the general population. Oh, that person looks old and they're doing this. So I guess when I get to be that age, I just need to embrace the fact that when I get that age, that's what I'm going to look like. Speaker 1: You know, I football officiated for many years and some of the guys that I would officiate with were a little older than me, yeah, and I don't remember how many times I heard them say God, I'm just getting old, johnny. You know, like they were getting old, like they were moving hard because they had a hard time getting up and down the football field. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And here I am flying up and down the sidelines like I'm in my teens. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And they were battling to move 30 yards without hurting, right, and they were just a little bit older than me, right? Speaker 2: And so it just all has to do with the definitions and the beliefs that people put in place as they, as they go through their reality and they see older people behaving and functioning, they just make this mental kind of like definition of okay, well, I guess that's how we act when we get to that age, and they just kind of make a general definition and plug it in. And then, when they get to that age, if you're not consciously aware of the concept of being okay or being able to erase the definition and put a new one in place, then you'll just you'll go ahead and age at that same level, yeah, based on whatever you've picked up along the way from movies, from watching your family, from from watching friends, strangers it comes from all different places and you just start creating definitions and expectations that when you get to be that age, I guess I'm going to just act that way. Speaker 1: Yeah, I was actually embarrassed of myself for being caught up in that thought process for a little while, because I've always um, I'm I'm not that guy that that lives within the mold never have been yeah I'm, you know, I don't. I've always been the one that bucks up against authority. I've always been that one that cuts my own trails. My, you know, cuts my own path yeah and when I, when I was in that music store and you were, I mean you made your decision, you disappeared. I have no idea where you were. Next thing I know you're up there checking out with the cello. That's all I knew. Speaker 2: Hey man. I knew what I wanted, I went in there. Speaker 1: And that's the way I've always been. Matter of fact, I think I taught you some of that. Speaker 2: Yeah, you did, because I've always just did what I wanted to do. Yeah, and I will say that that is probably one of the biggest things that I have learned from you over the years is that you know what. It's okay to make a decision for yourself and then just go do it if anybody's bothered or offended by it it's their. It's their problem, not yours, yours, it's on them and it feels really, really good and it feels very freeing to be able to just walk in somewhere or make a decision that I'm going to go do something and not sit there and get wrapped up in the them. Speaker 1: In the details, in the them Right. Who is this going to? Speaker 2: bother. Who is this going to make mad? What is it going to look like? What's this going to bother? Who's this going to make mad? What? Speaker 1: is it going to look like? What are people going to think of me? It's very freeing not to get jammed up with that it is, I agree, and that's where I was kind of embarrassed in the music store, because here I am, this guy that's normally like oh, I'm gung ho, I'm going to do this, I'm going to do that. And then I was standing there twiddling my thumbs like and you even said to me, eric, what are you doing? Speaker 2: I said are you having problems? Yeah, I'm like, what's the matter? You need some help. Speaker 1: And then I was like I was just playing it off because I was like walking around, you know, yeah he was. Speaker 2: He was just wandering around aimlessly in the store and I'm like, okay, what's the matter? You need some help. What's going? Speaker 1: on. You even asked me, or you said something, about money or something. You asked me do you not want to do this right now, or something ? And it had nothing to do with money. It had nothing to do with money , it was all about. Speaker 2: Yeah, I was just trying to figure out where you were at and what the hesitation was. Speaker 1: And then every time I go to talk to a dude, we'd walk up behind us, and so I was like , hey, I'm not going to talk about it with him. Speaker 2: Really, I don't feel like counseling with him, but in the end you ended up counseling with him. Speaker 1: Anyway, I did, you're right, yeah, but I was kind of really embarrassed by the whole scenario because I've always been that willy, nilly guy, that kind of flies by the seat of my pants, and here I am in a music store. I mean, we're talking about learning a musical instrument. It's something that makes you a more well-rounded, human and cultured, and I was hesitating to do it and so it was like it was a good spiritual moment for me, yeah, to stop and really get through those, because I sat down on that chair on that couch and was just like, okay, what am I doing? You know what's going on here. This guy just got in there and bang on these drums, like he's a 12 year or the the drummer for metallica, and I'm over here hesitating, if I do, oh my god, I'm scared I'm gonna play the guitar and fail because my fingers don't work, because I'm 51. Good lord, people, get the shovel, we gotta start digging the holes. I know I was like, anyways, I was embarrassed by it, but and I told the guitar guy, I'm like you realize that I just sit here and debate it, I'll learn the drums of the guitar, but I really want to learn to play the guitar. I mean, don't get me wrong, I don't play, learn to play both and I will. And I was like because I thought, well, maybe I'm just too old to learn, to have the motor skills still to do this. And the dude actually looked at me and laughed. I was like he literally looked me dead in the face and just with one of those evil laughs too, it was like made me feel like I was a you know tiny tim. But anyway, so I mean we got through it. But going back to the, the lady , I was like you know you, you realize that you're holding your own self back because you were taught that you can't do it nothing, because this woman is very athlete, I mean very, uh, healthy, active. Yeah, she's like, I want to say she's like 79 or 80. Speaker 2: Right. Speaker 1: And she's not old. I mean she's not old acting at all and she's retired. She has all the time in the world. Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the thing. Speaker 1: She could learn to play anything she wants, she could do anything she wants. And when we walked away from it , she goes. My son would just think I was, would make fun of me, and you know her 60 something year old son, come on, really they had, and so I was like what are you? What are you scared of? Speaker 2: yeah, so here's the rabbit hole concept. Okay, because sometimes what happens, because sometimes what happens, like with that example, she has told herself a story that her son will make fun of her. Speaker 1: Right. Speaker 2: And that is a story that she has created. She doesn't know for a fact that he will make fun of her. She has just created the story in her head that he will make fun of her. But I guarantee you I almost a hundred percent guarantee you that if she were to go have a conversation with her son, she would find out that that story is nothing but a big fat lie. Speaker 1: Right, I'm not totally agree, it may be something happened a long time ago or something where he didn't make fun of her because she tried something and failed her, but it seemed maybe she did, you know, come up to that belief and I actually told her well, get an instrument, go get lessons and don't tell anybody. You don't have to know, right, until you get good and then show him. Speaker 2: Because sometimes we create stories Totally About the them. That's outside of us. Speaker 1: Yeah, the monkey mind does I agree. Speaker 2: That is nothing but a big mind, does I agree? That is another big of that lie . I agree, we think they think this about us, but it's our story that we created, agreed. It's nothing at all what they were thinking. And whenever you, this has happened, even with you and I. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: When we've gone through different trials and different experiences, I'll say to you well, I thought you were thinking this about me or about whatever I was doing, and you just give me that same evil laugh that you got at the store because you're like that is the farthest thing that was even what I was thinking. And so I had created this whole story, this whole scenario in my head. I don't remember what it, what the most recent example was but I had created a whole story about what I thought you thought about me or whatever I was doing. That was keeping me from doing it, and it was nothing but just a big, fat lie that I had created in my head. Speaker 1: Yeah, I totally agree . Speaker 2: And so that's the rabbit hole. Part of it is when you think that you're doing something or not doing something, because you have this idea that other people will judge. You. Check to see if it's not a story that you're creating. That is nothing but just a lie totally agree to keep you from doing something yeah, totally agree. Speaker 1: it's in the, I think, another side of that when, when we come across these trials, are these not really trials? More of these monkey mind stories that get created about something that we're going to do ? Speaker 2: I think it's okay to call it a trial. I mean, this is kind of just like the big game of life. Speaker 1: Yeah, okay. Speaker 2: And when you're playing at a certain, you're playing level one, you have trials. Speaker 1: I agree. Well, you probably have trials at every level. Speaker 2: And then you go to level two and you have more trials, but the minute that you start to view them as Negative, yeah. I agree, Not fun experiences instead of oh, I'm going to try. You know, like when you play your game. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: The trial is you don't know the map yet, you don't have the right weapons yet and yeah, it's frustrating, but you keep playing until you know the map and you can beat and conquer that and you get the weapon and the armor. Speaker 1: It's the same kind of thing. Speaker 2: It's the same concept . Speaker 1: No, I totally agree with you, and so you know the guitar guy. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And he laughed at me. We were talking. He said so what made you decide to go guitar? What made you actually? What made you decide to go guitar? What made you actually, what made you convince yourself that you could play the? Speaker 2: guitar. Yeah, I said. Speaker 1: I didn't have to convince myself I could play the guitar. I had to relieve myself of the fears of learning to play the guitar. Speaker 2: Ooh Okay, say it differently. Speaker 1: I had to relieve myself of the fears behind learning to play the guitar. Speaker 2: And so what do you think was causing the fear? Speaker 1: Well it's, can I actually do it? Can I physically do it? Can I mentally do it? Do I have the rhythm? Speaker 2: I mean, you know, and that was because you had definitions that at your age it was possible that you had lost the bendability or the motor skills or the intellect I see you know, and we're actually taught that. Speaker 1: Well, do everything while you're young. Speaker 2: Yeah, you're right, that's one of those that gets programming that gets put in place. Speaker 1: And so I told him I had to convince myself, or I had to relieve myself of my fears. Speaker 2: Don't ever get old, it's hell. Speaker 1: I know right. Speaker 2: I can't tell you how many times my grandparents told me that I heard that today. Yeah. Speaker 1: I heard that today from one of our people. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: But anyway. So I told him I had to relieve myself of the fears of learning to play the guitar at my age. And I said that I had to relieve myself of my age. Speaker 2: And then you had to go to the bathroom and relieve yourself. Speaker 1: Yeah, a little bit, or something dribbled had to get it out. Maybe I dribbled. Speaker 2: That's all I could think of. Had to get it out. Speaker 1: And so he was like oh well, that's cool man. He's like so you're're gonna get some lessons and everything. I said, yep. He said, okay, if you get lessons, go home and youtube the and learn at least seven to nine chords before you pay for a lesson. Yeah, I said why. He said because otherwise you're gonna waste four or five months of your lessons learning to play these chords right, when you can learn it from youtube in two or three days. Yeah, and uh, I said two or three days and I I've started to say even at my age right and he said and he beat me to it he said, don't even say that, yes, you can learn in a couple days. It's not hard, the chords of a guitar not hard. And I was like, okay, okay, bet . And so relieving myself of the fears and giving myself the permission to not worry about what other people think or not worry about what I think of myself, what my human story has created, Especially not based on some number. Right, Because I don't. I mean, I don't feel any different than I did when I was 20. Feeling different than I did when I was 20. Speaker 2: Right, because if it wasn't based on thoughts, definitions and beliefs, then everyone, when they turned 59, would automatically robotically go into this place of not being able to do X, y, z. Speaker 1: I am not 59. Speaker 2: I'm just using that. Speaker 1: Did you see my eyes get big when you said that I did ? And he says that rightfully so, because I don't really keep up with how old we are I have to usually ask him I am 51 and you're nine months older than me I didn't say 59 because I was accusing you of being 59. Speaker 2: I was just using that number. Is this the number I pulled out ? It's, you know, you're, you're because there are 59 year old people all across the globe that are doing all levels of any and everything rock climbing skydiving uh what about that guy up in the villages that's 91 years old and just set the record for push-ups by somebody? over 55, exactly the man did 1390 push-ups that is metaphysical at its finest, totally that is metaphysician, that's metaphysical at its finest. And here's why Because the metaphysicians give the scientists things to research and if they, if age actually impacted what we were able to do , separate and apart from beliefs, patterns and programs, like I said, the minute you turn a specific age, Everything would change. Everything would change, but it would change across the board, for every single person. Speaker 1: Right, well, no, they say, your genes remember so apparently what store you shop at. Speaker 2: I haven't worn jeans in a minute. Speaker 1: I know right, you know we work around. Prime examples of this yeah. We have one lady that's about to turn 99 next week. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: Or this weekend actually. Speaker 2: Yep Saturday. Speaker 1: We have one lady that's 97,. Speaker 2: January 5th and she still works. The 99-year-old still walks five miles a day. Speaker 1: Does not use the elevator. And does not use the elevator and she acts like she's I mean way younger. And I actually asked her one time. She looks like she doesn't look , they did a spot on her in the news, remember. Speaker 2: That's right. She doesn't look 99 at all. Speaker 1: And we have a couple of them here that are like that. We have a 97-year-old and a 99-year-old, and they both. I asked the 99-year-old Would you chop some wood already and get rid of that ax? I asked the 99-year-old one day last year. I said what do you contribute to you being so spry and energetic for your age? And she said I am never turning old, never turning old that's right and I was like okay, that makes sense. And the crazy part is I asked the 97 year old before she moved in. what do you, what do you attribute to you being 97 and still so with it, and active, and she said I am not turning old. She said the exact same thing. The other one said that's right , tell me. There's not a collective consciousness, anyway. Speaker 2: Well, but I mean, it all has to do with how you're going to define the different words of the language. How are you, what definition are you going to put to them? Are you going to just accept what somebody else has defined it as and just roll with that, or are you going to blaze a new trail and rewrite your definitions Totally? Speaker 1: agree, you know, and that's really anything. That's really what this podcast started out, as is is uh, living you know, that's right don't care what age you are live . We're here for experiences yeah we're here to have fun. We're here to try things and do things and be things and and it's never too late everybody that's never too late. Speaker 2: It's never too late, Everybody that's one of the things it is never too late. Speaker 1: It's never too late to go do anything. Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean we're 51 . Yep, At 51, we're learning a new instrument. Speaker 1: Yep, we learned a scuba dive at 50, 49. 49. Speaker 2: Yep, I finished my doctorate. At what age? 40, 50. Speaker 1: Yeah, you finished it last year, right? Speaker 2: No, the year before. Yeah, so you're 49. 49. Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm working on mine. Speaker 2: Got my doctorate at 49. So I'm here to tell you that number does not mean. Speaker 1: Anything, anything, no. Some of the smartest people I know are old. Speaker 2: Some of the smartest people are seasoned. I was playing. Old is relative, I mean. Speaker 1: I was throwing that out there for you to slam the door joke, but you didn't do it. Speaker 2: I don't know that joke. Speaker 1: Some of the oldest people I mean some of the smartest people I know are old. Speaker 2: What does that mean? Speaker 1: Well, I was expecting you to say well. Speaker 2: Oh, were you boning me. Speaker 1: Yeah, you mean ribbing, not boning. Speaker 2: She didn't mean boning, oh you mean Boning is an endo-endo. Yeah, you're right Ribbing. Speaker 1: Ribbing. Speaker 2: Oh, so you were ribbing at me. I was ribbing at you. Speaker 1: Yes, as if I'm old as if you're the smartest, one of the smartest people I know who's old? I was calling you old okay, got it that flop, that joke was a flop where's your what? Speaker 2: where's your button? Speaker 1: keep your day job, man keep your day job, and so you know. I think the main part of that is realizing that we're never too late, we're never too old. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: We're not Throw that. The only time we're ever too old or the only time we're too late is if we believe it. Speaker 2: That's right. I would take those two words out of my language altogether Too old and too late. Speaker 1: Or not able to. Speaker 2: Yeah, that's another one. Chunk that shit in the trash. Speaker 1: Yeah, like we also have one of our people here that has a son that has Down syndrome. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And he just won national. Speaker 2: Gosh, he wins stuff all the time man. Speaker 1: He wins the national athlete of the year for the special olympics yeah and he works full-time job, lives on his own yeah when he was told all his life that he would never would live on his own that's right and here he is. Here he is. You create your own limitations , that's right, I agree. Speaker 2: Perfectly fine, perfectly young, perfectly healthy individuals can let their mind keep them from doing so many things. If you get tangled up in the I can't, I shouldn't, I couldn't, not, able to. Speaker 1: I wish I could. Speaker 2: Right, Like toss all that stuff in the garbage and live life. I mean how? Speaker 1: many times do you hear people on their deathbed saying I mean, I hear stories about it all the time. I wish I could have done this. I wish I would have done this. Speaker 2: I don't know who you're hanging around, but I don't really hang around people on their deathbed. Speaker 1: I mean, I kind of hang around people that have already gone off their deathbed well, I just heard the same story, two or three months ago, from a guy at his terminal. He said I wish I'd have done I don't know how many stories he had told me. I wish I'd have done this different. I wish I would have done this. I wish because I asked him how do you feel about this? And he just started telling me his regrets. And so don't go through life with regrets. Don't allow your monkey mind or the perception of what you think other people are going to think to stop you from being the most biggest complete you. The fear yeah. Speaker 2: Like toss all that away in the garbage. Speaker 1: Become you and be unique. Speaker 2: Unique Speaking of unique are you ever going to finish that tattoo? Be a eunuch. Speaker 1: A eunuch. Yeah, you know the unicorn farts. Speaker 2: What is a eunuch? I feel like a eunuch is really from a place. Speaker 1: A eunuch, it is. What was that? I don't know what that was. Were you? Speaker 2: eating your cabbage or your carrot yeah, maybe I just. Speaker 1: We just went down a rabbit hole, so anyway somebody look at it. Speaker 2: Where are people from who are eunuchs? Speaker 1: eunuchs, eunuch, okay , do you ever stop you? Speaker 2: Maybe, hey, maybe. Maybe, it's a good guess. Speaker 1: Or they call them yogis. Speaker 2: That's a yogi bear on the cartoon. Speaker 1: No, I think maybe they call them yogis. I don't think so, I don't know. I don't know either. Well, so I guess I'm kind of feeling complete. Are you complete? I don't know either. Speaker 2: Well, so I guess I'm kind of feeling complete, are you complete? Yeah, I'm good. Speaker 1: Hey, remember guys, just don't fall for the crap. Be you, be adventurous, have fun. Speaker 2: Get out there and try , you're never too old. Get out there and try some stuff, man. Speaker 1: Yeah, do something Live adventurously. Yeah, all right, we something Live adventurously. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: All right, we love you, all Love it. Don't forget. Hey, like, follow, share, subscribe and. Ring that bell and look up our social media. We are at the Merck Centers, at the Merck Centers T-H-E-M-E-R-C-C-E-N-T-E-R-S, and that's also our website at themerccentersorg. We love you all Deuces. Speaker 2: Live, adventure, love you. We'll see you next time.