Unveiling Resolutions: Exploring Beliefs

Speaker 2: Thank you. Speaker 1: Good morning everybody. Welcome back to the podcast. Good morning, hey. This is a milestone for us. We are starting our second season today. Speaker 2: Where's the applause Use buttons? Speaker 1: oh, my applause I forgot. Yeah, that's right. Season two, season two, episode one, and it just happens to be january 1st 2025 yeah, welcome to the new year. Speaker 2: Adds up to nine. Speaker 1: I remember when I thought the year 2000 was like a long ways away. Yeah, and it adds up to nine. And that means what abundance right In numerology? Speaker 2: I don't know. Ask Google. Speaker 1: Oh. So the new year and new season brings different topics. Speaker 2: It does. Speaker 1: It does. Interesting my topic today, you ready? Speaker 2: Do tell. Speaker 1: So with the new year, I was looking at some research this morning. Speaker 2: Okay. Speaker 1: And did you know that less than 18% of the new year's resolutions that people make are actually accomplished? It's like 17.8% on the study that the university of Colorado did. Speaker 2: Why is that? Speaker 1: Oh, that's where the topic goes. Why is that? Speaker 2: I don't know? Speaker 1: Oh, I would. I would assume it's because a people are just lazy, Just kidding. Just kidding. That's a human response. I think it's beliefs. Speaker 2: Okay. Speaker 1: And accomplishing your New Year's resolutions. Are they in alignment with your reality that you've created and the intentions you've set? Speaker 2: So I'm sorry? Say again Are you creating? Speaker 1: Say again oh, are your resolutions in line with your reality and your intentions that you have set for your reality? Line with your reality and your intentions that you have set for your reality? Or are you doing basic, human, societal, taught resolution? And if you are doing those, then why aren't you accomplishing them? That's where the topic goes today for me, because it's going to be a and where on that do you find yourself? Well, I don't do your new year's resolutions because I don't really even do no, I don't do them either. it's, but the majority of people out there do and, uh, matter of fact, the study said that 91 percent of americans do some kind of a new year's resolution and less than five percent of them write them down. They're normally done at the ball drop right afterwards, after they start their new human time year, and they make these new year's resolutions and the next day they don't remember because they were so drunk that they don't even write them down or accomplish them. Speaker 2: Right. And so well, they never will accomplish them if they set them up in a format that keeps them in the future. Speaker 1: I agree, I agree. Speaker 2: I'm going to do this. Speaker 1: Yeah, and so there's three topics. Speaker 2: Okay, you're going to keep going to doing it. Speaker 1: Yeah, there's three things in the resolution making that makes them not be accomplished. I think A1 is your terminology of your intention. B is your belief system. Behind it and see your human ability to actually subconsciously process the steps by which your higher self is is giving you the the, the clues of the life of which way you should go. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: And I myself think that new year's resolutions are kind of ridiculous. I think they need to be. If you're going to do a new year's resolution, why not do it on Valentine's day? If you're gonna do some kind of a resolution, resolution is something that you want to make better of yourself and when you, you should be doing that every day. Speaker 2: Well, yeah, I agree. I mean subconsciously you do, you do a new resolution Kind of just every frame by frame in that reality. You really kind of do that on a subconscious level, because that's how the mechanism works. Yeah, every time you level, because that's how the mechanism works. Every time you experience something that's uncomfortable, whether you're awakened or whether you're not you make a log of that and you say, wow, that was really uncomfortable. I don't really want to experience that again. So I'm going to do some things to not have to go through that again or not have to go through it on that level in that way. So the the deep reality is I think you're making a new year's resolution multiple, multiple times throughout the year, I agree it. Agree. It's the intention behind it, it's the way you set it up, it's the format by which you try to execute, or the lack of. Yeah, and I think the conscious awareness of I mean, did you do it just because everybody else was doing? Speaker 1: it. Speaker 2: That's right, there you go. What's the point? What is your purpose? What is your why? Why are you doing it? Just to fit into the group, so that you're like everybody else and not look weird? Are you really truly deep down wanting to accomplish said thing like? What's your why? For for wanting to? Speaker 1: change. That's exactly where I was going with it is. We have a tendency to follow the herd and like, for example, I remember one time I had said many years ago, I said in New Year's resolution I'm going to lose weight this year. Why was I going to lose weight? I felt fine in my own self, I mean, I was comfortable, I was happy and I wasn't even really heavy. I felt fine in my own self, I mean, I was comfortable, I was happy and I wasn't even really heavy. Speaker 2: I just wanted to lose weight and get my boyish body back from my teenage years. Speaker 1: I'm sorry that he took it from you and the reason why I did it so I think that's a part of it is it's the lack of ability to have conflict resolution and it's the fact of why are you doing it if it's not something that makes you feel good, based on our pain and pleasure template and our fight or flight template? Speaker 2: Because if somebody says I have to hear this out. Speaker 1: Okay. Speaker 2: If Well, I'm glad that you know where you lost it, because then it's easily found. Speaker 1: Right, I agree, I agree Okay. Speaker 2: Now that. Speaker 1: I know my comedian moment, we can move on. So, like for the example that I would give on conflict resolution, like the term that I heard yesterday that was said well, my mom said, for your New Year's resolution, my New Year's resolution, I should do this. And so, because this person didn't want to do a conflict resolution, to say, well, that's not what I want, mom. Speaker 2: What is a conflict resolution based versus a resolution? Speaker 1: well, because it uh what's the difference? Well, conflict is. Well you know the conflict is. It's a disagreement between two people or a belief that's bumping up. It's a conflict. Um, it's a um you, peer pressure is a conflict, and some people, based on the flight or fight, fight or flight mechanism , don't like to approach conflict even with upon themselves. They'll run from it and ignore it or just fall in line with the herd. Speaker 2: I see. Speaker 1: And so if you don't know how to process those conflicts that come up on your resolutions, or if there's, if, if those resolutions don't even fit, what process those conflicts that come up on your resolutions? Or if there's, if those resolutions don't even fit, what makes you feel better and then address the conflict within it, then you're not. You're not accomplishing the very first step of resolution, which is believing that you can actually do it well, what if you live in a space where you're not allowed to have those kinds of experiences? Speaker 2: their parent and probably still live at home and under that guideline, what if they feel like they can't go against the parental guidance? What do you do about that? Speaker 1: Well, you know. Speaker 2: If you're in a marital situation and your partner is hell-bent on one thing and you're wanting to go in a different direction, like there's different scenarios. Speaker 1: I agree. Speaker 2: So how do you navigate that? Speaker 1: situation. Well, that still all falls back on conflict resolution. And so when, like, for example, the example that I gave was actually not an adult and they don't live with anybody I mean not a child and they don't live with anybody that I know of Okay , but you're right If you're a child and you're living at home, generally speaking, the conflict resolution within the of all of that is about the communication with whoever they're living with. And you know, look, listen, I appreciate the input on my resolution, but that's really not what I want, and the reality of it all is is it's just the communication within it. Same thing If they you live in a marital situation, you know, in a true marital situation, the communication is the key to that. And then coming to a copacetic place for both parties to agree. But the silly part about all of it is is resolution should be done all the time, and so this should be in practice. Speaker 2: Right, I agree. Speaker 1: And if you're, and if you're in a situation to where you have created a spot where you're not communicating or you're not doing what makes you feel good on the inside, then that's a that's a, that's a that's a you problem. That's not, it's not anybody else's fault. So like if this example that I made, if this person does not communicate that and say, listen , that's not what I want, this is what makes me feel good and I hope you love me through it. But if you don't, you don't, then that becomes a them problem , because their beliefs are worried about what other people think. Now, in a marital situation, it is give and take, and so it is more of a balanced thing that has to be communicated about. Do you agree? Um, crickets, all I got was a head bob, just like kind of like on Dumb and Dumber, that little head bob. Just like kind of like on Dumb and Dumber, that little head bob On a higher plane on a spiritual level. Speaker 2: there is some aspect of me that does agree. You said aspect On a human level, we can definitely create realities that make it feel like it's not that easy. Speaker 1: What do you mean? Speaker 2: Please describe your Well. If you're, I mean if you put yourself back in your teenage years, if you went to your parent, who's a very staunch guider and they're not necessarily a guider, they're more like a dictator. You said dictator necessarily a guy or they're more like a dictator, then you're not going to be given the freedom necessarily to be able to go to them and say I mean, you've created a reality where you don't necessarily give yourself the freedom to say, yeah, that doesn't really work for me, but thanks, that doesn't really work for me but thanks, or sometimes in a marriage, you could have created a marriage that feels humanly like. You don't have that option, especially if that person is very staunch in their viewpoint, their beliefs, their patterns. Then what happens? Your path bifurcates and you go on your way and they go on their way and you experience your two separate journeys because they're different. Like so there's part of me humanly that agrees, there's part of me spiritually that agrees, but then there's part of me in both those aspects that disagrees, that agrees, but then there's part of me in both those aspects that disagrees. So that's why you got a head, bob, because I'm not 100% one way or the other. Like there's a lot of that. Speaker 1: If a relationship bifurcates because of a resolution, then there was other issues involved, because that should be communication. But in my opinion, that's just where I think about it, because it's just a resolution which should be a done daily basis. Now, when you, when we do, have resolutions that we put out there, that is against our belief system. We have to look at our beliefs behind it to make an accomplishment and our what did you say the other day? Verbology, the verbology of something. Speaker 2: Yeah, the verbology, I mean the verbology is a significant part of communication. Speaker 1: I agree. Speaker 2: Especially the verbology that we choose in the culture that we were brought up in. The verbology that we choose and the culture that we were brought up in, the English language has so many variations of one word it's very, very easy to misinterpret what one says verbally Dude, dude. Speaker 1: Sorry, I had to throw that in there. Speaker 2: Dude, and so it can be challenging. Speaker 1: Yeah. So how do we teach people to do daily resolutions and to make them achievable? Because it's a human American tradition to do resolutions and that's actually international. But the resolution behind the new year is something that people do once a year, so only once a year. I guess they want to improve their life or improve their reality, which makes zero sense to me. Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, you're living in a multiverse and each individual is on their own path. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: And so there'll be a group of them that are going to do it once a year, and 17% of them, obviously, are going to do nothing about it, and that's just part of the buffet of life. Speaker 1: The 17% is the ones that actually accomplish them. Speaker 2: Oh my bad. Speaker 1: It's the other 83% that don't I see? Speaker 2: But then if you break that 83% down, what? What percentage? Are doing it on a daily basis? And accomplishing it and don't feel the need to or don't feel like they can bring that up in some survey. You know, I don't know the need to or don't feel like they can bring that up in some survey. I mean more exploration, more data. Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree with that. Speaker 2: Statistically if you're a scientific person. Speaker 1: But what we do know that if you want your resolutions, be it daily, yearly , monthly, quarterly, whatever that is to be accomplished, we know that you have to believe that it can be accomplished first of course and whether you can, or whether you can't that's right I don't remember who said that napoleon dynamite maybe oh , it is what it is, if you can or you can't, is that what you mean? Speaker 2: I don't know why you felt the need to reword what I just said no, I was. Speaker 1: I was just thinking in my head. I was trying to answer your question. Speaker 2: Some popular person made that, coined that phrase. Speaker 1: I think it was Jack Black. Speaker 2: Whether you believe that you can or whether you believe that you can't, it's true. Speaker 1: I agree. Speaker 2: I agree so what do you choose to make true for yourself? That's correct, I apologize for whoever needs to get that credit. Can one of the staff members look that up, please? Speaker 1: Thanks, yeah, please, producers, can you do that? Tick, delete. It's this. That's the producer in the background. Okay, all right. So the the belief system is what hinders the flow of daily change. Weekly change, yearly change, um, let's say hinder, don't really hinder, it actually kind of captains the change. Because if you bump up against beliefs that don't follow your resolutions or your daily changes, or what weekly changes, whatever that is, then that resolution is going to be almost impossible to accomplish. And here's a prime example and I used we used to use this all the time back when I was, when we were doing lectures is if you tell a kid, when you eat little debbies it's going to make you fat, and they believe that. Every time they eat little debbies, their subconscious mind creates a place to store that energy. And and when you tell them enough, they believe it. If you tell somebody they're stupid enough, they start believing it right if and when they believe it. If they say, for example, the new year's resolution is I'm going to get my master's degree this year, I remember that two years ago with you it wasn't a resolution, no it wasn't a resolution. You just came to me and said I'm gonna get my master's or my or my doctorate, and if you believed at that time that you weren't smart enough to get your doctorate, you wouldn't accomplished it oh, I agree 100 and so looking at those beliefs behind your resolution is the very first thing. Other well, the second thing actually, because the first thing is deciding what the resolution is. The second thing is I. Speaker 2: I think the first thing is deciding why you're going to do a resolution. Speaker 1: Like that's the first step, yeah. Speaker 2: Are you just doing it because you want to fit in? Because, if that's the reason you're doing it, don't waste your time. Yeah, don't waste your time. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: Are you doing it because you truly want to accomplish some sort of growth or evolution under the topic? Because if the true underlying desire is that you truly want to see change, then naturally you'll put in the effort or the action to make the change, to do the thing. Speaker 1: I agree. Speaker 2: And you'll find a way to make it fun. And it'll be enjoyable because you truly want it, you truly desire it, and so then it doesn't feel like work or a chore or a have to kind of thing , because that holds very much a different energy and a different frequency about it and whenever it holds that kind of frequency it makes it no fun and it makes it. You know, you said I I can speak for me. When it falls in that category or it falls in that frequency, it makes me not want to do it. Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree. Speaker 2: Because I think to myself there's so many other things I could be doing that are much more enjoyable than this, so why the beep am I doing this? And so then I sit with it and toggle around and say, okay, what is the why? Why am I doing it? Okay, and if it's something that I view that I have to do, then I start playing with it and see if I can see it from a different perspective and come at it from a more exploratory place of excitement, like I get to do it or I'm doing it for a different reason, right, and see if I can't find a better feeling place within it so you're coming from the perspective, let me, let me make , let me paint a scene for myself, because I'm trying to, because you had said why is the first step? Speaker 1: and? And so you're asking, why? Speaker 2: why do I want to do this thing so? Speaker 1: what is the first step? And so you're asking why? Why do I want to do this? Speaker 2: thing. What is the thing, though? Yeah, let's pick an example. Okay, you started with weight. Okay, I want to lose weight. So when you're there at the ball and partying with friends and you make a new year's resolution, or whatever that scene looks like, and you say well, my, my resolution is I'm gonna lose 30 pounds this year okay, so now you've identified what, and then you go to the why and why am I doing that? is it just an empty statement to fit in with the crowd and you really have no intention behind it to even mess with it, visit it again, toy with it? Um, which, generally speaking, if you're going to take the time to say something out loud, there's some part of you that wants it. That wants to do it because you have some sort of belief or perspective about your body image, because we're going to stay on the topic of weight. So if you're going to take the time to announce it out loud to all that can hear, then I would say as a guide, as a holistic person, leader, the first thing would be to look at why did you, what in you made you choose that and give it some sort of space in your reality by announcing it out that that's what you wanted. Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I totally agree. Speaker 2: It came up and it came out for a reason. Speaker 1: Yeah, I totally agree . Speaker 2: It came up, and it came out for a reason, yeah, so there obviously is some underlying perspective about yourself that you want changed on a deep level. But we're going kind of deep, so let's back up. So the first thing is are you committed to what you just pronounced to the whole world at the 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 moment Right, right and are you committed to doing whatever it takes to get you to that goal? Is it a true goal or were you just kind of farting around because you were in a social setting? Speaker 1: trying to fit in, yeah farting around? Speaker 2: right, because you were in a social setting just trying to fit in. Yeah, because if you're just farting around and you just said something to try and fit in and that's really the extent of your intention, yeah, then why? Speaker 1: there's no point. Speaker 2: I mean it stops there , honestly, because no matter if you come to someone such as myself or yourself or you try and attempt it on your own, it's not going to be very long lasting, because it was to satisfy the them outside of you and those things typically don't have a longevity of energy span , they fizzle out very quickly. Speaker 1: Yeah, the value of them goes away. Speaker 2: Yeah, the energy fizzles out. Speaker 1: Totally agree with you. Speaker 2: And so that would be the first thing. If you're truly on a journey of commitment and want to see yourself accomplish this thing, then you dive deep, then you dive into, okay, what does weight symbolize, and what does it symbolize in my bubble? And is it because I have a perspective about myself visually, or I mean we could go so, so deep into all of the things that extra weight symbolizes and means. That's like a three or four part series. Speaker 1: Yeah, well, I think, any topic really can be when you're doing resolutions or you're trying to do daily improvement. Speaker 2: So I'm trying to keep it very general and kind of surface-like that would apply to any topic, really. Speaker 1: No, I agree. I think once you've decided okay, you know New Year's Eve is coming up, you're going to do a resolution because you're going to be drunk and somebody's going to walk around with a microphone that's doing some kind of a video cast and going to hold the microphone to your face and say what's your new year's resolution? And you blurt out in a drunken state never make another resolution. It'd be like that guy on Johnny Carson that time when they were doing that and he held the mic to his face and neither got his looked at him. Like I don't do resolutions, it was pretty funny and it was talked about for months. But so you? So you know you had a new year's resolution coming up. You know that that, uh, you look in the mirror every day and you say I think I need to lose some weight. Or you either, or you answer the phone and it's somebody saying hey, I've got a fitness class you should, you should come join, throw off, you know, throw off those. A fitness class you should come join, throw off those five or ten pounds you need to lose. And you believe that that's a different kind of intention behind your or a different kind of why. And then when you start getting into the beliefs behind it which you said is a very deep topic any belief topic about any certain improvement I think it's going to be very deep. Oh, yeah, it's called the onion effect. Yeah, topic about any certain improvement. Speaker 2: I think it's going to be very deep. Oh yeah, there's, it's the. It's called the uh onion effect . Speaker 1: Yeah, layer by layer it can be very deep it can and so it can also be a very easy process. Speaker 2: I mean you can peel the layers or back very quickly, within minutes right then. Speaker 1: That's where I was going to say well, to go is when you determine why and you make the decision that, okay, this is what I'm going to do, be it a new year's resolution or a daily , when I get up in the morning I'm drinking my coffee, I'm going to change my life. You have, you have now decided and you're going to make a commitment to this, and that comes with the happiness, the successes behind it, the bumping up against beliefs, the conflict behind it, and so you have now made a commitment that you're going to do this, and no matter what the consequences are or the way it makes me feel, if I do pump up against a belief or a conflict somewhere, I'm going to accomplish this goal. Because now that resolution, once you've decided why and you've committed to it, it now should become a goal for you, which that's kind of verbology, as you say it, as a resolution and a goal are really kind of the same thing. It's just one's accomplished and one's not. And so, once you identify the why, you identify the what, the why, and now you're looking at the how, which is your belief clearings or your belief system behind it. Because, like, for example, I had the other day, one of the one of the ladies made a comment about having to buy new clothes because she had gained so much weight and I said well, why don't you just work it off? If you don't want to buy new clothes, and work it off, or or or lose the weight to go back to where you were, oh, I can't, because I have diabetes. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: Well, that's just that. It's not the fact that you can't because you have diabetes, it's the fact that you believe you can't right Because you have diabetes. And and my response to that was , as I pointed out, a couple of people walking around like that person's got diabetes, that person's got diabetes and they're not. They're not heavy. Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean for sure . If that person's not there, though, they're going to stay where they are. Speaker 1: I agree. Speaker 2: But that's with anything. Speaker 1: And so the commitment to it and figuring out those belief systems behind it and be open and receptive to looking at the beliefs Like if you, or like my grandpa used to say, if you count calories, you're going to multiply them onto you. If you cause you're, you're believing that that is a negative thing, when your body needs calories to operate every single day. Of course, and so you're now identified calories as a bad thing in your body needs calories to operate every single day, of course, and so you have now identified calories as a bad thing in your, in your thought process, and so that becomes a belief and you know, like the textbook answer your body needs 25 or 2800 calories a day, or whatever that is to function, and so for me to lose weight, I I'm going to consume 2,100 calories a day. Well, that didn't make any sense, because now your body is being starved of nutrients, as it needs. Maybe, and so, or whatever, and it's going to store those nutrients when it gets it in abundance, which in turn causes people to gain weight. And I also heard one time what was his name Farley Chris Farley the comedian. Somebody asked him one time why he was heavy and he said because I'm happy. Speaker 2: Right, that's an old, old one. Yeah, that's an old adage. Speaker 1: Yeah, fat and happy. Speaker 2: Yeah, because back in like 1700s, 1800s, being heavy was representative of abundance and you had enough riches to be able to eat the food. And so it was looked at as a societal positive thing. Oh, I wish we could be fat, because that means we would be rich and abundant and could eat whatever. So if you were skinny and scrawny, it represented something entirely different than what it represents today, in our age. Speaker 1: Yeah, I remember in that interview when he said that because it was the topic of well, you're a celebrity now and world famous comedian are you? Do you plan on making your appearance different? And because this was back in the the early 90s- yeah when that was the trend, that all celebrities were skinny, they had these bright white teeth. You know that whole sabang yeah, exactly there wasn't very many heavy heavy celebrities back then. Right, and he? His response was he why would I change what got me where I am? And that was a big statement If you really stop and think about it. Why would I change what got me where I am? And the interviewer's response was because it'll make you healthier. And he said I am healthy, I am happy. And he said if I decided I wanted to lose weight, I would Right. But I'm not going to do it because other people think of me negatively. I'll do it because I want to. Speaker 2: Right. Well, I mean, and that's the key in any of the processes on any topic, if you're doing it for somebody else, if you're doing it for the people outside of yourself, it's not going to. It usually is not going to stick or be long lasting, no matter what its title is, no matter what its verbology is, and and so that's. The next step is deciding okay, what does this mean to me and why would I want to achieve this thing? And we're going to stick with weight. Why do I want to release weight ? First of all is how I would state it. Speaker 1: The verbology first of all is how I would state it the verbology. Speaker 2: I would not ever call it losing weight, because if I lose something, then it means that I want to find it again, and so I shall yeah. Speaker 1: And it always pops back up. When you lose something, you always end up finding it. Speaker 2: Yeah. Speaker 1: So that's the verbology behind it. Speaker 2: But yes, so the first thing I would do when I'm committed I would change the wordage. But figuring out is it truly something that you want inside of yourself? Is it representing a belief or series of beliefs that you're ready to look at and let go of or redefine for yourself because you've been like? You used the example of the child being told little debbies are going to make you fat. If that child gets into their adult ages and they're tired of carrying around that baggage and they decide that they want to restructure their body image, that would be a belief that I would look at to see. Is it? Is this programming still beneficial if it's not throw it in the trash and either replace it with loving energy or rewrite the whole thing to, to say even maybe a rabbit hole concept of I can eat whatever I want because it's all just energy, and still maintain my set point and weight? Speaker 1: Yeah, I totally am running with it. I agree. You know the what, the why. Speaker 2: Are you running away from it or running with it Running? Speaker 1: with it the what, the why, the how and how come. You know the how come, how come . You know the the how come I think what is how come? Speaker 2: how come I'm doing it . How is how come different than how what? Speaker 1: oh, what is that? Well, how is how you do something, how come is why you do something? Speaker 2: so how and how come? Speaker 1: so you add one word from the verbology and it changes the context of it Like, for example, how is a step-by-step process of how you're going to accomplish something? A how come? Speaker 2: is a personalized why . The step by which you're going to accomplish something is the how. Speaker 1: Yes. Speaker 2: Okay, and the how come. Speaker 1: Is a personalized why . So if you say I'm going to lose weight is my resolution? And then you say why? Oh, because I want to feel better about myself. Speaker 2: Okay. So how is that different than just? Why Is that like? Speaker 1: a hillbillyism. I'm trying to explain it. And so if you say why? And you say I'm going to lose weight because I want to feel better about myself, and then you own that and you make it personal it's the how come it's more personal to me? Why is such a broad statement? How come is more personal For you, for me, I definitely feel like that is definitely. How many times are you going to say definitely? Speaker 2: Because I just find it so, and on an anthropology, Listen lady. Place. I find it so very interesting that you add one word to that and it changes it for you. Speaker 1: Well, here's why. You want to know why? Because what does the word come mean? Speaker 2: Wow, we're going to go there with that. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: You want all the meanings. Speaker 1: I'm just telling you what I think. Speaker 2: Come means to move from one direction to another, towards something. Speaker 1: Towards something. So how come there's the sexual? Definition of that. Well, those are spelled two different words. Speaker 2: It depends on how you're spelling it. Speaker 1: I agree. And so now you've made it personal. And your, how is your step-by-step, your, how come is bringing it to you? Speaker 2: But if you break down the verbology and the, how is the steps by which you come? It's just the same thing. It's the steps by which you get from point a to point b we're gonna have to agree, disagree, I guess. Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, whatever works for you. Speaker 2: I just wanted, I was just curious because in my mind, oh, that's different in my and it's like it is the virology behind it. Speaker 1: So you can say why. That's not a come hither comment, that's not something that you're pulling energy to you for. When you say how come, you're saying it can be. Speaker 2: If you're asking the why why do I want this? Why do I feel like I need this it can be the how come. Speaker 1: It can be, I agree, you know. But I think when you're, if you're a little lighter in the britches, in the spiritual world and you just say why, it still leaves that question in your mind of why it leaves it. But when you change it to, everybody understands how and they understand, they understand come like come here when you, when you change it to how come, it puts it more on a personal level and the verbology behind it is given positive energy for it to come to you. that's my thought behind it I see which is why I always say I'll come, but anyway, that's kind of. It's kind of, that's all definitions, which we already had a podcast on definitions. So I just look at it and when I identify why and if I decide to do something, I figure out the how and then the how come. Speaker 2: Okay. So whenever you're going through your process and you get to the place of answering the question of why, what in your mind? What is the answer to that? Speaker 1: Because I can. No, I always answer that question that way, but no, really when I. So this is how I do it. Speaker 2: So when you're sitting there contemplating life and you've come up with a topic of okay, why am I doing this? Why do I want to do this? Speaker 1: Why what's? Speaker 2: the why. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: So you just say to yourself because I can, and you move on to the next thing no. Right, that's what I'm asking. Well, like this this. Speaker 1: This bring the topic of hand. We, jenny and I, for Christmas, decided that we were going to both learn a musical instrument. Speaker 2: Some of this more than others. Yes, instruments, that is. Speaker 1: We're actually. Jenny has removed all of our living room furniture and it's now become pretty much a live band with many instruments already and some more on the way . But when we were having that conversation I asked myself why? Why would I want to do that? And remember, we had the conversation about Life's Little Instruction Book and I thought to myself well, that's the, probably the why, because I read that years ago and, you know, because you read what years ago in life's little instruction book, and one of the days of it was learn to play a musical instrument. And and like again, if and it said, if you already know how to play one, learn a different one . And so that was the why for me was because so I identified it Because it said it in the book, because it said it in the book and back then when I was doing Life's. Speaker 2: Little Instruction. And what did that mean? What did that mean to you? Speaker 1: Well, the Life's Little Instruction book that I was going through years ago the ones I didn't accomplish I put into a folder, and so when you brought that up, it popped back up into my reality, which is why I said, yeah, I'll do that. And so I had to identify if that was something really that I wanted to do, how come I wanted to do this. This is the why I said, yeah, I'll do that. Speaker 2: But how come is the answer to the why? I'm sorry, that just tickles my funny bone but anyway I, and it's because you and I are a we that I can laugh, not at you, but with you you're laughing at me, don't lie, you're laughing at me. If I were with a client, I would not laugh at you if you needed to use the words how come . Speaker 1: Well, because I know you're not smelling when I'm stepping in. But the why I said yes on the big musical instrument I am. Speaker 2: I get it, but my why encompasses how come. But my why encompasses how come . My why is a multi-step process that includes the how come. Speaker 1: So I don't have to add an extra step. Well see, that would have been more simple, it's just a different way. Speaker 2: I would rather laugh at you actually, yeah. Speaker 1: I know you enjoy it. I laugh at myself too, so that's okay, Because it's like the why was? So the why of the electric guitar, why I said yes, was a reason because of the last little instruction book. But then I was like, well, how come I said yes to this? Why? Speaker 2: Okay. Speaker 1: How come I did that and what is the steps of it that I wanted to do. But I know you know to the listeners. Speaker 2: And so what was the answer to the how come? We're all curious. Speaker 1: Because I want to be multicultural, I want to be more balanced in life and I want to learn music. I do want to, and that was the outcome for me, no matter what you said. It was really your idea you brought up. I agreed to it. Speaker 2: But then why did I agree to it? Why did I agree to that? Speaker 1: And so it made it more personal. Speaker 2: I see. Speaker 1: And so the whole part of it was it didn't matter if you were in my bubble or not. If that would have come in my head, I would have went through the same process. Speaker 2: Yeah, I get it. Speaker 1: And so the how come for me is how I identify like individual things within the why , and which may work for some people may not work for some people. Right, it's just like. Speaker 2: Yeah, so if we bring it back around and we kind of wrap it into a nutshell, why? The why question is multifaceted. Speaker 1: It can be general. Speaker 2: And is beneficial if you go ahead and visit those different bullet points. I guess within the why. Speaker 1: Right, that's what I use. How come for? Speaker 2: And you use the verbology of how come to get you down the list of those bullet points, to really take it from a general standpoint to a localized personal standpoint. Speaker 1: It's just a way to create levels of thought for me, yeah, and. Speaker 2: I do the same thing. I just don't necessarily call it a how come. Speaker 1: Yeah, and so what, why, how and how come, or how come and how you can do that I can. Sometimes I do those steps in opposite directions. Speaker 2: Or you can just do like I do, those steps in opposite directions. Or you can just do like I do and the how is the steps or the actions that I'm going to take to accomplish it. Speaker 1: Right. Speaker 2: And the why for me is really digging deep, taking that general concept and then breaking it down into the sub particles of my intimate being personally Right, the sub particles of my intimate being personally right, taking it from a societal concept of why did I react? Why did that pop into my reality? Why? Why do I feel drawn to it in this very moment? Do I feel drawn to it? Is it something I truly want to do? Dig around in that. If it is, why? Is it? Because I have a belief in place that if I do this, it'll make me look like a better person to the them. If I do this, it'll make my parents prouder of me, because I have some sort of story in my head that my parents are not proud of me. If I do this, it'll make me more successful, because I have a wonky definition of what success is If I like. What is the why? So when I'm doing my why, I'm breaking it up into looking at all of those different sections and I and when I look at those, I write them down and I visit each question that comes up and whenever I ask the question, I sit for a minute with the question and I see how it makes me feel, because it's going to evoke some sort of feeling. Even the lack of feeling is a kind of feeling. Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree, it's a neutral point. Speaker 2: So whenever I ask the question of why am I doing? Why did I agree to do this? And we'll talk about weight just because that's our topic at hand. The first thing that might pop into my head is wait, did I really agree to do that, or was it just a verbal going along with the crowd? Yeah, you know what I'm cool with me. I didn't really agree to do that, I was just kind of going along with the crowd. Speaker 1: Yeah. Speaker 2: Well then that's when it can bifurcate. If you want it to, why did you go along with the crowd? And that'll take you in a different direction, and that'll take you. I mean, if you want it to, why did you go along with the crowd? And that'll take you in a different direction, and that'll take you. I mean, if you truly believe that you're comfortable with your weight and nothing really pops up, then I would go a little bit deeper and explore okay, why did I feel it necessary to just jive in with the crowd and do what they were doing? And that could take you down that adventure, which would be very interesting. But then if I look at it and I say, oh, you know what, when I think about my viewpoint of my body image, yeah, I don't really like the fact that my pants feel tighter. Okay, so then let's dig around more in the why. Why do I not? What belief am I running? What program am I running that makes me feel uncomfortable in my physical body? Then from there, you just keep going down the list, keep dropping a level, keep dropping a level, keep dropping a level. And as you sit with each one of those, the emotions will come up about it in the process of working through it, and whenever an uncomfortable emotion comes up in it, that's a good indicator that you might want to spend a little bit extra time on that level to really explore. Why does it make me feel that way? What's in the programming that causes that emotional guidance system? Speaker 1: to go off. You mean how? Speaker 2: come. Speaker 1: So, going on through that, we have kind of given everybody the steps of why, what , how come, how come and how well, we didn't really explore the how and the how is what's next in it. And I've always taught people and this has been over the many years is when you you you probably heard this before make your goals timed and attainable. And what I mean by timed and attainable is, whatever that timeline is, because it's yours, it's your goal. It can be 25 years, it can be 25 seconds. That time is yours. Now time is a whole different rabbit hole topic, but because it can be instantaneous in the spiritual world. But attainable is the key, and so, then, the steps behind it need to be simplified and direct . Speaker 2: Yes. That's the how that's a very general, step-by-step process, but it can trip up if you're not careful. So I will agree on some level, but I will agree to disagree on a few levels. I feel like we want to give them just a tad bit more information so that they possibly would help them, maybe not have to experience the trip up parts of it. Parts of it. When you give a goal a time, if you're not careful and you have an expectation or an intrinsic need for it to look exactly like that, then it can jam you up and it-. Speaker 1: And be limiting, and it can limit you. So be careful on setting a time limit on things and to be more descriptive about it is if you say, um, I'm going to find a hundred dollars today, you just put a topic in place on a timeline to kind of make people understand a little bit. More so if you say I'm going to find a hundred dollars today, you've just limited yourself. You could have found a thousand and you could have found it right now. More so, if you say I'm going to find $100 today, you've just limited yourself. You could have found $1,000. And you could have found it right now. Speaker 2: But if you said it like this, I want to find at least $100 no later than today. Then that opens up the amount, and so, therefore, it could be two hundred dollars, it could be three, it could be five, it could be ten million, it could be whatever it opens it up. Yeah, so then let's see if we can restate the whole sentence to where it opens it up on a on a timeline basis. Um, the the idea is is that you want to give yourself space, that if it's meant to come to you in the next five seconds, you don't want to create a limiting sentence or belief that keeps it from coming sooner than the timeline by which you believe is actually has the ability to happen. Because if you have a belief in place, that and we use money because it's a really, really good example If you see that $10,000 is a lot of money and it is more difficult to what people believe goes on, which is to manifest that into your reality, and we'll just kind of keep on that train of thought because it can get very rabbit hole-ish If you believe that $100 is a lot of money to try and manifest, then you may not be able to get there from there, right, and if you feel like that being able to manifest it in the next five minutes is completely unattainable and just not even cognitively something that you can wrap your brain around, then you haven't lived the belief or you haven't worked with that and it just is an unattainable thing. You just can't get there from there. Speaker 1: Agreed. Speaker 2: And so don't let putting timelines and amounts on things cause additional limiting beliefs within the intention that you're making. Speaker 1: I agree with your statement. Speaker 2: But it is a good idea to break things up into. You know the adage out there eat the elephant one bite at a time, don't make an expectation or don't set something up that is so unattainable that you set yourself up for a non-win-win situation I agree, I agree and so I I understand what you're saying. Make it a small little baby steps to get you from that point a to point b, but don't limit yourself. For example, I want a job by the end of the year that allows me to make a hundred thousand dollars. Don't be so staunch in that it has to be a hundred thousand dollars that when you only make 92,000 and it took a year and a day that you walk away from it saying, oh my God, I don't know how to manifest anything. I'm disappointed because it didn't look like what I put my intention out there for. Speaker 1: This is what I'm saying. No, I agree. Speaker 2: Or, at the same time, if you can get to a place where you're malleable and very flexible in it and you just sit the intention out there and you can open up even broader, you could make $200,000 in 10 days. Speaker 1: Agreed. Speaker 2: And that's the idea situation. I agree Is being open enough to be able to do that. Speaker 1: And then taking the steps. And I want to add this little side note this should all be written down. You should really journal it or , if not, make a you know like we use our phones for verbal notes and those kind of things to where you do it. And the steps should be short and direct. Speaker 2: Do we need to talk about why it might be important to write them down? Speaker 1: I don't think so. I think we've covered it before . Speaker 2: Yeah, I disagree. Well then talk about it, Because if you're I mean if you just keep it logged in your head life happens Like that's what we're about here. We're about showing people how to formulate your spiritual daily activities around the human experiences and how to juggle all of that. And so if you, if you're in your private moments and things come up then you got to get up and go get a shower and go to work, then sometimes it gets lost and you don't remember to go back and revisit it or you don't remember exactly the details and it can get lost in there. Speaker 1: I agree. Speaker 2: And so writing it down is a very good way of keeping track with things as they pop up. It's not always the most convenient, some would say, but nowadays we have our phone, we've got the little notepad on our phone. We even have the voice recorder . Speaker 1: You can turn that thing on real quick and make a little recorded note to yourself without even having to type anything agreed and so writing down doesn't mean getting out the stone tablet and hammer and chisel ping, ping, ping, ping, ping, hammer and chisel it in anymore ping ping, ping, ping, ping, hammer and chisel it in anymore. Speaker 2: Just make some sort of memory notation of what, what the topic is, and then the things that pop up throughout your human day that would be beneficial to look up, or the information that comes in throughout your human day that coordinate with the topic that you set the intention to work on . Speaker 1: Agreed. Speaker 2: Everybody listen. Speaker 1: Our cat is begging to get into the office. Speaker 2: We call it going to work, and so she likes to come to work, but she's not very helpful. Speaker 1: She sounds funny too. Speaker 2: She's not very beneficial when she comes to work. Speaker 1: So the last part of it is well, there's two parts left. I think the steps need to be short and direct. Speaker 2: Some people it can be . It depends on where you're at in your belief systems. Obviously, okay, if you are in a place where you're just really kind of trying to embrace the big concept that you just set for yourself and and you've got to work yourself slowly towards the idea of making a hundred thousand dollars, you do have to take it in baby steps, because if you try to look at the whole big picture of, oh my god, okay, how am I going to do that? It can look daunting and then it's like, okay, wait, I've been off more than I can chew, I can't do this. So then it goes in that never accomplished New Year's resolution pile. Speaker 1: Right and short and direct will give you the opportunity to mark them off as you go too, and it makes you feel accomplished. Speaker 2: That's right, and it builds energy and confidence. Speaker 1: And I think the last part of that is the commitment. You know, like we were counseling the other day and, and the main part of it that counseling session was leave no doubt. Um, for me, leave no doubt means make sure that, including yourself, there's nobody around you that has any doubt that you're accomplishing this goal. Speaker 2: No, I, I would say it even better than that. There is any doubt that you're accomplishing this goal. No, I would say it even better than that. There is no doubt within you. Speaker 1: That's what I said, including yourself. Speaker 2: Only yourself. I wouldn't worry about the people outside of me. Speaker 1: Well, some people aren't in that spot. So if you are going to leave, no doubt make sure you accomplish it within the way that makes you feel better, and even if that includes what you, if you care what other people think. Speaker 2: some people aren't in that place. Speaker 1: And when. When you leave no doubt, you make sure that you understand that the doubt behind it only comes from you, because you're worried about what other people think, or worried about what yourself thinks, and so leave no doubt that you're going to accomplish this goal. You're going to find the beliefs behind it. You've already identified all the why and the steps, and you've documented all this. Leave no doubt ever in your mind that you're going to accomplish this goal. When you get up in the morning, yeah. Speaker 2: So my question real quick on that would be okay. Well, so once you've gotten to all those places and you're at that point so once you've gotten to all those places and you're at that point, what does it feel like? How do you know when you get inspiration to do something, what is the next step? Like if you've decided, okay, I'm committed and this is happening, and whatever, where do you get the next step? Speaker 1: What do you mean? Speaker 2: You've identified the steps. Like if you're sitting there humanly and you've, and you've done all of this and you're like , okay, what are the steps? And you wait and you don't really hear anything, or you don't really, or two concepts come in. How do how do you know which one to pick? Or how do you know when it's time to act? Speaker 1: Well, I think you just act. The energy has to get moving and sometimes those steps will change. Speaker 2: And what does that look like? Like you just get up and walk across the floor. You just do it. That may be step one. Speaker 1: That's maybe step one . Just do it. Whatever that first step is, just go do it. Speaker 2: What if nothing is coming to you? Well then, Of what to do. Speaker 1: I can't answer that question. You're the doctor. Oh, thanks, wow, because I can't talk for experience of that. Really, if there's something that I've identified how come for, then normally the steps come to me when I'm thinking of how come, okay, generally Okay, generally Okay, what do you think? Speaker 2: Well, I can speak from experience in the early days, where I get everything all situated up and I've identified all this in my book, but then it's like I sit there and I'm kind of feeling around. Okay, so like, what do I do first? Speaker 1: Well, I think that's all. Speaker 2: Like, okay, I know that I know humanly, in order to accomplish this, I've got to do X, y, z, but X and Y, they can be done together, they can be done together. Or I know that in accomplishing things, I got kind of confused and jammed up on okay, well, what do I do first? And not being able to decide okay, what do I do first, and so that in and of itself tripped me up a little bit and I did nothing because I didn't know what to do first, I guess, is where I'm trying to take it. And so how do you know, when you're taking baby steps, how do you know what's the thing to do first, or what's the like where do you go from there? Speaker 1: I don't know, I got nothing. You keep asking the same question, just wording it differently. I have no clue, because that's not always fair. Speaker 2: I was just trying to go there in case there were people out there that had it, that were in that place. Speaker 1: I really don't know. Speaker 2: All I can say is that what worked for me was I just chose one If they felt like they were equally comparable and it didn't necessarily feel like it mattered. I had to really lean on my guidance system on how it felt, and so if I had made my to-do list and I had two items on that list that felt very similar, I would just pick one and I would just kind of go with it just to get the energy moving, just to get the ball rolling, just to get the action going. And then what I found was that by doing that it got the energy moving. It brought in a little more of the excitement, which then motivated me to do the next thing and the next thing and the next thing. And I found that the reason that happened for me was because I was still looking at it from too broad of a perspective and I had that deer in the headlight moment still kind of going on that I wasn't acknowledging and it stunned me for a minute of OK , I've got this big, huge plan in place and, oh my God, now it's time to start. And I got to do all these things . And so I was still looking at it from a very broad place and so dialing it in, bringing it back into the now and just picking something, picking one of those things it feels like I can do this or I can do this and they're very equal, Like one is not going to benefit one or the other, and just taking that first step towards the unknown that gets you from that uncomfortable place to the comfortable place of, okay, I'm doing this, I'm doing it, Even if it's something simple like answering the phone which just rang and that's why I said that, Sorry, that was a human glitch in the spiritual information coming in. Even if it's just something simple, like if you're starting a business, information coming in. Even if it's just something simple like if you're starting a business ordering business cards, just to get it in a tangible format to where it's like okay, this is now an actual thing and sit with that, then that propels you into the next step. Speaker 1: I think, is what I wanted to add. Well, I feel complete. Are you complete? Yeah, All righty guys. Hey, thanks for listening for the season two episode one of the spiritual grind, and welcome to the new year. It's January 1st 2025. Speaker 2: Yeah, thanks for playing with us today. We are looking forward to playing many days to come and we hope you have fun and we love you Don't forget to like, follow , share, subscribe and. Ring that bell man. Speaker 1: And look up our social media at the Merch Centers. That's T-H-E-M-E-R-C-E-N-T-E-R-S, and that's also our website. Just add the org on the end. Appreciate you guys. Speaker 2: Right on. Speaker 1: Have an awesome New Year's. Speaker 2: We'll see you next time.